i have cut to the feeling on repeat

[keeptrucking]

[Scene: two losers go to a shopping mall, because Daichi was wandering around looking disappointed in himself yet again and Joe has Better Ideas Than That. Daichi can't remember if he was actually asked if he wanted to be here, or if he was simply dragged along for the ride again and couldn't refuse once they were already at the mall. Joe just happens so much at once, despite all of Daichi's half-hearted complaining, so... here they are.

At the mall. Daichi is, at least, not sulking about whatever he was feeling inadequate about before. Instead:]

Man, my feet hurt... [Here, he affects his best (worst) Joe Voice:] Let's go shopping, Daichi! It'll be fun! —It's been nearly three hours and all we have to show for it is one magazine. C'mon, you could have done this without me.

[This menace... Why is he here, Joe? Why??]

Comments

[armanyo]

[ his neckwear is quality content. he's fascinated. utterly transfixed. or he's just trying to make daichi less of a human train wreck. ]

The finishing touches. Stand still now.

[ he's humming some tune to himself as he's looping the tie around daichi and then begins to knot the tie. ]

[keeptrucking]

Okaaaay, just for the record, I know how to tie a tie. It's not like I haven't been wearing one to school every day for, oh, years.

[But uh, feel free. That's cool, too. He'll just stand still and watch... Joe's... hands? Yeah.]

[armanyo]

[ his hands are very entertaining, he knows. there's at least five love songs written about them. ]

Yeah, but did you think to put one on? Noooope.

[ he's grinning now and does the final touches and tada! he'll grab daichi's shoulders and try and spin him around so he can inspect himself in the mirror. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Look there's just a lot of Joe up in his space happening right now?? And nobody's in danger of dying horribly so he actually has to notice it. The manhandling.

Manhandling like being spun around, whoa-] You didn't give me one— oh. Huh.

[...]

It... looks... better than the first one?

[armanyo]

Yup.

[ joe is very proud, all right? even if he had a hand in picking out the suit, he's still strangely proud of the dork in front of him. ]

It's loose but that's what the tailoring is for.

[ duh!! he grins and just. pats daichi's shoulders. for no reason. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Hhhands. Hands!! This hands/pride combo is too weird, nobody is ever this nice to him...]

Does... that mean I don't have to try on the other ones? This is the part where I stand up on a box and that old guy puts pins everywhere, right?

[That's what happens in the movies. He's thinking it.]

[armanyo]

[ he's thinking it, too. ]

As much as it pains me to see suits neglected, yeah. This one'll do.

Lemme go grab Jacques and tell him you're ready for your closeup.

[ joe??? those hands!! are also lightly patting daichi on the back before he heads over to the portly old man to grab his attention. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Hands... Daichi sort of - laughs a little? Why is he laughing? He's going to pick up the rejected suits and make the pile he left them in a little neater before that old guy gets back here.]

Riiight... I'm not going anywhere.

[armanyo]

That'd be shop lifting.

[ WHAT A NERD. he fetches the old man and gestures vaguely at daichi. ]

Makes him look kinda sharp, huh?

[ joe please stop complimenting him in front of the old dude. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Joe!! Daichi just looks exasperated, but he shuffles over to stand there and get pinned all to hell. This is the part that's going to take forever, he just realized, help.

Also he's still wearing Joe's hat, which he realizes only after he's been posed appropriately to hold still.]

Joe, take this back. [Now he's just repeatedly glancing up at the brim of the hat, a good look for him.]

[armanyo]

Take what back?

[ he's not sorry at all. he's just standing there innocently. watching. ]

Stand up straighter.

[keeptrucking]

I can't get straighter— Take your hat, you dunce.

[Ah, he's so nice.]

[armanyo]

Nope. You insulted me. You're keeping it.

[ at least until they're done. that's a quality hat you can't keep it. ]

[keeptrucking]

I-It's a punishment hat?! Ow— [Daichi getting stuck with pins count because he's not holding still well enough: 1 and counting.

He drops his voice to a stage whisper, like speaking more quietly will help him hold still,] I'm not carrying it around for you all day.

[armanyo]

You aren't carrying it. You're just a mobile hatrack.

[ what the fuck.

either way, joe is nodding approvingly and just looking at jacques like he's on the joke. he is not in the joke. ]

It looks good on you.

[keeptrucking]

Thanks. [jerk....??] You already told me my hair doesn't look good with it.

[He's just saying, pick one.]

[armanyo]

[ HE CAN'T PICK ONE. ]

Your hair, yeah. But if we're ignoring that and looking at the big picture.

[ joe, please. he's clasping his chin with his hand, thoughtful. ]

Heyyyy we should get you one of your own!

[keeptrucking]

A hat? No thanks.

[He already has a scarf, the only accessory he'll ever need. Where is his scarf, by the way. He feels naked without it.]

Let's just stick with the suit I let you talk me into somehow... without even talking...

[armanyo]

I have that effect.

[ on people? on daichi? who knows what he means.

but he's going to just.... reappear with said scarf and he's tying it into a fucking bow-tie.

maybe jacques is a little annoyed at this point. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Jacques is definitely going to be annoyed when Daichi gets stuck with pins at least 5 more times, now that he's being scarf-tied. Joe?? Joe.]

Dude, not the time— ow ow owowowow— You're getting me pincushioned to death here!

[armanyo]

[ five times? it's going to be closer to fifteen by the time they're down. ]

We're making the complete picture. Can't half-ass this.

[ he's so unfazed. ]

[keeptrucking]

[why you gotta do him like this]

Man... I could be in the cafeteria sipping a cool drink right now, instead of doing all this... [If he doesn't whine once every two minutes, his brain stops working, so it's lucky Joe doesn't ever seem to give a damn about that.

Anyway presumably he gets pinned to all hell and makes stupid pained sounds every time he gets an errant pin stuck in him because he can't hold still. He's never been more tense in his life when it's finally over, and there are still pins everywhere.]

This is worse than fighting demons! Well, no, not really, not much can top that, but this is pretty... prickly.

[Prickly. He gives old man Jacques a lame half-smile.] My fault, totally mine and not yours. Maybe even Joe's.

[armanyo]

Hey, hey. I've been poked many times.

[ that sounds so wrong? so wrong!!!

but joe just keeps grinning lazily and he lightly clasps jacques on the shoulder. ]

Lemme know the estimate and I'll put down the security deposit, old friend.

[ the man is already noting the alterations he'll need to make based on the placement of the pins. just give him a few more seconds to finish before he can start undoing those pins. ..... or rather.

he'll just walk away muttering to himself. ]

Guess I can help out.

[ UNDOING THE PINS? ]

[keeptrucking]

[Joe, don't be like this... Daichi mercifully shuts up while this pin calculation is going on, but he can only make a hopeless and confused noise when the old man just walks away?? Leaving him here, posed, pinned for eternity?

Or with Joe as his only savior, which might not be any better.]

Be careful! I think I'll be stuck like this if I have to hold this pose any longer.

[armanyo]

[ listen!!! he's here to help. he's always here to help. let him live.

anyway, joe is going to painstakingly remove the pins. one by one. he isn't making that much headway honestly. he's only removed the ones up near his shoulders. ]

Geez, why put them in if you're just gonna take 'em out?

[ JOE? ]