i have cut to the feeling on repeat

[keeptrucking]

[Scene: two losers go to a shopping mall, because Daichi was wandering around looking disappointed in himself yet again and Joe has Better Ideas Than That. Daichi can't remember if he was actually asked if he wanted to be here, or if he was simply dragged along for the ride again and couldn't refuse once they were already at the mall. Joe just happens so much at once, despite all of Daichi's half-hearted complaining, so... here they are.

At the mall. Daichi is, at least, not sulking about whatever he was feeling inadequate about before. Instead:]

Man, my feet hurt... [Here, he affects his best (worst) Joe Voice:] Let's go shopping, Daichi! It'll be fun! —It's been nearly three hours and all we have to show for it is one magazine. C'mon, you could have done this without me.

[This menace... Why is he here, Joe? Why??]

Comments

[armanyo]

Why not?

[ wow. wow? wow.

joe is going to dangle another fry in front of daichi's face. the audacity of this man! ]

[keeptrucking]

I didn't get to finish my food...!

[Fry injustic aside, his neglected burger? Don't meatblock him, Joe. And don't wave fries in his face!!!]

Sit up already, you— you! [nailed it.]

[armanyo]

[ you what? YOU WHAT? ]

I have a name. Or do I?

[ the fuck. anyway he's going to sit up properly so that daichi can consume his burger. it's fine. he won't meat-block you. not yet, anyway.

but he is waving another fry in daichi's face. ]

[keeptrucking]

[This is the day Daichi dies, he can feel it. He just makes a face and goes back to his burger, thanks!!

......until there's a fry in his face again jOE]

Joe, I'm just trying to eat! [He whines, a whiner whining. But look, he's put down his burger - again - to grab Joe's guilty fry hand this time and get it out of his face. 4/10, effort.]

[armanyo]

Dinner and a show, though.

[ there's hand-holding again. that's gay. that's so gay.

except joe is still grinning like it's the funniest thing in the world and not awkward. he's not deterred and instead uses his innocent hand to dangle more fries in daichi's face.

sorry. ]

[keeptrucking]

[Holy shit, please, let him rest. He'll resent being the show part of this dinner and a show in a moment, except he'll have no way to defend himself after he quite literally gets up off his stool and makes like a weird emergency dash to the other side of the kitchen island to escape Fries.

But he's still holding Joe's hand, somehow, so this goes about as dumb as it could.]

[armanyo]

[ he's being tugged off his stool on this grand kitchen-island-adventure. it's so downright amusing and it's a close-second only to scarfnapping. daichi, why did you think this would work? ]

Hey, hey, the burgers are over there!

[ oh look now who's hungry? for meat? ]

[keeptrucking]

[This was a really good idea until he actually moved—no, it always sucked, he did this to himself. Now he's over here, burgerless, tormented. Hungry for meat.]

Put the fries down and no burger gets hurt. [no, daichi.]

[armanyo]

[ no. ]

Nah.

[ no. joe just smirks, lazily, and has this look. ]

I'll eat both burgers. Don't tempt me. I have an iron gut.

[keeptrucking]

[hey first of all, what the hell?]

You'd let a guy starve, just like that? I'm disappointed, Joe.

[Now, he could just go pick up his own food, or he could do the dumb thing, so of course he's going to yank Joe's hand so he has to get up and leave the burgers. Ideally.]

[armanyo]

[ ... ideally. he'll follow, though, for some reason, tossing a sidelong glance back at the neglected burgers. ]

Hey, hey, hey little man.

We have fries. I've been feeding you fries. You won't starve.

[ joe. the impossible. ]

[keeptrucking]

[No, they're over here now, doing... this. Whatever this is. Daichi winging it instead of just shutting up and eating.]

You didn't actually feed me any fries, Joe. [that'd be gay? this meal hasn't been that gay yet.] There's always a chance I'll starve right here, right now.

[Half bullshitting, half whining, All Daichi.]

[armanyo]

[ all daichi all the time. ]

Why else did you think I was dangling them in your face?

[ TO EAT THEM YOU DOOFUS.

but joe is just grinning relentlessly. ] Eh, I don't see the problem here.

[keeptrucking]

I know what you were doing! [He didn't eat your gay fries, that's the point!! So he's still potentially going to starve! Stop giving him that look, god, what a doofus.]

Can we finish eating without you sticking fries in my face? Please?

[armanyo]

What if I shove the burger in your face?

[ no, he's kidding. maybe. anyway, he's going to nod. he's hungry so he'll throw in the white flag for now.

for now. ]

[keeptrucking]

Have you ever heard of self control? Even a little?

[grumble mumble..... here, he'll go back to the counter to continue eating.

And he supposes he should let go of Joe's hand, too, so bye hand.]

[armanyo]

[ bye hand, he hardly knew you?

he knows a lot about self-restraint actually. a lot. but he goes back to his stool and eats his burger like a mature adult, keeping his hands and food objects to himself.

you're welcome.

isn't this such a nice meal? in his apartment? alone? ]

[keeptrucking]

[Yeah, this is great, finally Daichi is free to eat the rest of his meal and have nothing like fries in his face to distract him from thinking about being alone with Joe in his apartment. Cool.

He's hyper-aware of Joe sitting there behaving like a grownup now, so he'll just focus... intensely... on his burger. Maybe a stray fry. Delicious.]

...Did we get drinks for us...? [that was all a blur of sweet pranks at the end, did they fuck up.]

[armanyo]

[ they fucked up.  they really, really fucked up. ]

Nope.... Oops?

[ joe sets his mostly eaten burger down and tosses the most apologetic look ever to dawn his features. ]

There's some soda and water in the fridge. And beer. Take whatever you want.

[keeptrucking]

[Beer...... Joe.]

I can't drink beer... [The law, Joe!!! He'll get up and take a normal soda that isn't 50 sodas crying out for vengeance in one big gulp cup, thanks.

And while he's here,] What do you want to drink?

[armanyo]

Water's fine.

[ no soda for him. ever again. and you can drink beer if you want you nerd. you are in the joe's abode. ]

Thaaaaanks, Daichi.

[ oh my god please don't do that. ]

[keeptrucking]

[No, he's a good boy and drinking is bad for you? Also what if beer is gross and he embarrasses himself?! Soda is safe.

Joe can have his water, Daichi slides it over as he sits back down.]

Don't say it like that. Drink your water.

[armanyo]

Aye aye, Master.

[ if only joe was capable of not telling jokes. no wonder him and hibiki get along so well.

he uncaps his water and takes a swig.

and you know what? you know what time it is?

it's fry in the face time one last time. ]

[keeptrucking]

Don't call me that, either! [Joe!! Thin ice, mister.

Daichi's peaceful soda drinking is interrupted by another goddamn fry, and everyone wants to know: what stupid anime noise does he make?!

It's an eep. He actually says "eep," out loud and loudly, at a fry in his face. It was surprising!! Watch him spill soda on his uniform, now, as a bonus.] Joe...

[armanyo]

[ i'm fucking crying.

joe blinks, long and slow, and then is hurrying to grab some napkins he had fetched earlier. in a flash of arms, he begins trying to dry and soak up all that soda on his uniform.

he didn't expect a fry to be so startling?!? ]

Eh, eh, this won't do at all. You're going to need something dry.

[ ........ ]