dumbshow | don't stand so close to me

Who has enough money to pay to down the head of the Phantom Troupe? No one, and Hisoka likes it that way. He especially likes when his interests do not cross. Illumi having no interest in going after Chrollo is good. Illumi not going after Gon that one instant? Good.

No tug away from his hand by Illumi has him smiling. He won't push his luck though, and doesn't try to push his hand into more hair, despite the desire to.

"Anchor, isn't that just what it is? Your pins are 'anchors' to keep things in place, hm?" Smiles, shrugging up his shoulders and moving to pocket his hands. Lead the way, Illumi. He really- doesn't care about the target at all, that's true. But he could care about him in the next moment perhaps. Maybe kill him with a stray card for shits and giggles? Who knows. Depends on how he feels. He doubts Illumi will run into any trouble with this job, so Hisoka will just take the opportunity to mingle and eat for free.

Ugh, Gon. That boy is trouble- do something about him already, preferably something that will edge him away from Killua. How annoying...

Illumi hums again, moving past Hisoka to lead the way out of there. 'Anchor' is an interesting term for it, he'll have to keep that in mind— his brutally utilitarian application of nen to make it do what he wants leaves ironically little room for finesse. It does what he needs and he's forcing his way through to perfection slowly but surely, but it's likely true that going through all of the steps to learn nen fully before hammering out a personal skill would, well, help. 'Anchor'— if he stopped to visualize more deeply, just calling it that would probably do wonders.

Thanks? Hmm. "Something like that." As they walk he recites the description of his target he was given by the client, businesslike; older gentleman, balding, likely going to have his young wife on his arm and gravitate towards a certain set of people at this event with more influence than the rest... It's honestly all very dull, but Illumi goes through it so Hisoka knows which paranoid old man to stay away from.

He does realize how this could backfire, yes, but that's the usual consequence of giving Hisoka information. Hopefully that red suit will get him enough attention to be entertained.

When they come up across the street from the event hall he pauses, watching the entrance and thinking. Although they've teamed up before, they don't usually do the actual work side by side... but if he's pretending to be someone else with a plus one, then- uh. Looking convincingly plus-oned is not his forte. To Hisoka, like he's totally repeated this all out loud and not just thought about it, he says, "Can you convince them?"

Do nothing about him and keep your best friend, how about that. Hisoka would prefer if they just remain friends, what's the harm in that? Why do you gotta be so controlling? It can't be good for your blood pressure.

Hey man. He could always help you better learn Nen principles if you asked, just saying. You just kinda rushed everything else in order to learn your little tricks. Not really the best way to go about it. Sure- Hisoka himself learned everything by himself with little hints from others, but he atleast spent a lot of time hammering through it. Not everyone's spoiled like you~

Anchor is the best way to word it in Hisoka'a opinion, and were Illumi to speak to him more on the subject, he could probably get a better idea of how to control this ability. While Hisoka himself isn't a teacher of any kind, he knows his way around Nen to be able to properly assist someone should they ask- and should he care to help. Anchor, as in- something to 'pin' his nen in place. Using Nen to manipulate his own body into shifting appearance, which takes some concentration. Using Nen alone to keep it there would be incredibly difficult, but the pins assist. Needles holding pictures in place, 'anchoring' his body and Nen in place. Visualizing the pins sinking into his aura and pores releasing his aura alone would help Illumi better get an idea on how it works, and thus get closer to mastering it. But eh-

Who asks Hisoka things?

"Ah ha-" Smirks, looking to the door men and then back to Illumi. "Can you keep quiet?" Winks, sticking his tongue out a little and going to pinch at Illumi's cheek.

"Course you can, you sneaky assassin you." Cutie patoot. Shakes Illumi's face a little with the hand pinching at his cheek before letting go and moving to walk ahead. Why yes, Illumi, he is A+ and lying and bullshitting. He will sweet talk either of them right into the event without so much as a list looked at. There's just something about a guy in a bright red suit with that much- confidence. Like he can do anything- like he would've done anything to get passed them... The idea of questioning a man like that- doesn't occur to them, was it intimidation? Charm? Hard to say. Sure easier than killing them and having to clean up after yourself.

But he's no good for Kil... Illumi's blood pressure would be much better if Killua listened to him, is that so much to ask? Yes? Awful.

The problem with asking Hisoka for help- other than the enduring uncertainty that he's not lying through his teeth for kicks- is that Illumi doesn't want... help. Doesn't want someone else's hand involved in honing his nen usage, even if it's only through suggestions and tips for dealing with aura. If he's steeped in ideas from someone else for too long he thinks he might lose his vice grip on his skill as it is now. It might creak and jerk uncomfortably and it might not stay for as long as he needs without so many obvious needles, but it's his. That's too important to risk, he tells himself, and he believes it.

He's getting there, regardless. Picking up ideas piece-wise wouldn't be effective for anyone else, but for someone as ruthlessly efficient as Illumi it has a much better success rate. He can do it, really.

—And Hisoka is pinching his cheek, already at it before Illumi draws his attention away from the door. That's—not the answer he anticipated, and certainly not ideal, that's his face... This time he does lean his head away a bit, raising a hand to push pointedly at Hisoka's elbow even as his face is released. Just so everyone's clear that he's not a big fan of unsolicited pinching. A beat, and he takes a couple long strides to fall into step beside Hisoka again. He'll just look terminally disinterested in chatting while Hisoka gets them in, then- keeping quiet it is.

Illumi, someone really needs to teach you about how to properly support growing boys. They need to learn some form of independence and social skills, otherwise well--

I mean just look in a mirror, honestly.

You can't even lie to get yourself into a fancy party. Sometimes you just need help though, them's the breaks. Sometimes you need to ask guys you can't really trust either, sometimes they purposely will try and fuck you over too. But who's to say what will happen here! Either way- everyone needs help eventually, taking it the hard way? Why- then you end up older than you want to be, just learning things you could've learned ages ago. If Hisoka had more help, with how far he is now? Just imagine if he had someone actually help him learn when he was younger... hone his skills young-

Ah, but what a silly thing to dwell on.

Better for Hisoka to drop little hints of things here and there. 'Anchor'.

They're in in no time and the elegance of the inner walls is quite nice. Hisoka stands enamored by it for a few moments before moving on. There seems to be a good amount of people already gathered and Hisoka already finds a small group to slide into, speaking to them with a smile and getting names and small greetings. Though he keeps himself aware of where Illumi is, his aura, at the same time trying to be perceptive of any potential auras worth while near by.

What about him isn't- in...dependent? He can feed himself. Look, not everyone can be a mysterious vagabond.

Once they're inside, Illumi doesn't bother with the facade of being there with Hisoka longer than it takes Hisoka to ooze into an existing group; he just vanishes, aside from the presence of his aura. He likes to get to work as quickly as possible, but it's also just to keep up the plan of not being remembered by more people than is absolutely necessary; the longer he hangs around the bright red suit, the more his face will stick in other guests' memories- so there he goes.

Of course, he's not invisible- if Hisoka glances around the event hall at the precisely correct times he'll be able to catch a glimpse of Illumi drifting just outside the crowd or slipping out of sight behind a partition. His target moves much less but amasses a crowd around himself in a vain attempt to look more important than he is- true, but unimportant, as Illumi doesn't need to know why his client wants this man dead to do it. Asking is one of those Zoldyck rules he actually tries to keep up with; that is, don't ask. There's no point whatsoever.

When the job itself is done, it isn't a brutal and bloody affair. The feeling of Illumi's aura spikes for the briefest fraction of a second, and a gray sleeve disappears out into a hallway at the same time the target gets up without any grand ceremony and walks out a different exit, a needle embedded unseen in the back of his neck and hidden by his shirt collar. It goes without saying that he won't be coming back- it takes longer to force-walk him to an obscure location than it does for Illumi to carry out his task and make a call to the client, honestly.

All in all, it's barely pushing thirty minutes after walking in the door that Illumi reappears at Hisoka's elbow, looking for all the world like nothing more than a reserved- but innocent- young man who got seriously, seriously lost trying to find a restroom.

Surely that's where he was all this time. Not a single person has actually spoken to him directly yet, so this is going just fine so far- simple. How long will he have to endure mingling...

Is he a mysterious vagabond? Does he really deserve that title? But he dresses so nice.

Right, he doesn't want to be 'that guy with the red suit guy', heaven forbid. But Hisoka doesn't even question the disappearance. There's most likely no reason for Illumi to use zetsu here, so he'll sense his aura all along the way. Would he USE zetsu well- then he'd assume something else might've happened, perhaps his job has a guard with nen? If that was the case Hisoka miiight come take a peak.

But none of that. Aura spike, and it's not nearly as large or long winded as his own, Hisoka will admit he tends to go a little overboard when he's in the right mood. But while Illumi can be boring as a rock, he IS efficient- for the most part.

"Ah- hm?" His brows peak, seeing the change in expression on a woman's face he had been speaking to. Her eyes glancing over his shoulder and he follows them, turning his head to see Illumi behind him.

"Haha- where'd you go off to? You always get so long- if you'd excuse me." Looks to the woman again, bowing his head and giving a goodbye before turning and heading away from her at a casual pace. "I have a little more food to eat- ah, they chose a grand sparkling wine here." Smiles to him, going to pick up one of the slim glasses from a passing waiter.

He dresses nice on Illumi's dime, Illumi gets to give out whatever titles he wants. So there. Vagabond.

He blinks. "Bathroom," flatly, by way of explanation solely for the benefit of woman looking at him. Then he's turning to walk away as well, ignoring that same ray of wine glasses in favor of glancing innocuously over the crowd. No one is wondering about the absence of one man—and they probably won't for a while yet, but done is done and he doesn't make a habit of hanging around.

This, truly, is the peril of bringing a plus one. Having to stand there looking sociable. The next waiter passing with wine he does take a glass from, if only to look busy. "It looks like you're having a good time. I wasn't planning on staying all night."

"Yes honey- that's where you were." A smile, nod, glancing back to his company and whispering with a hand against the side of his mouth.

"He's a little slow." Said before he pushes Illumi to move away and get that food and drink.

"Oh we won't, I'm just taking advantage of the situation." A smile, tipping his glass back, eyelids low. "You really sound get better with people, it could do you well in the future." Chuckles, sliding his tongue over a lip, tasting the crisp liquid still left there in drops.

"Mmm, but then I might have to share you." Illumi with other friends. . . .

Scoffs, laughing to himself. "Nevermind nevermind."

Wow, Hisoka, you are just a delight at all times. Illumi is almost offended. He doesn't even know how to pretend to be a bit dim, that's beyond his acting capacity, who let you make this decision-?

He considers the wine instead. It's probably a very nice wine, but he'll more than likely leave it on an unassuming table on the way out without drinking any of it. While he watches bubbles stick to the inside of the glass- "I don't need more allies." That they can agree on, at the very least. People skills aren't a requisite part of being an assassin- they detract from it, in his opinion, thank you very much- and it probably doesn't help that he finds most people to be vapid and useless in the end anyway.

A tray of hors d'oeuvres passes them next and he plucks one off of it. While he'd prefer to have left already, he isn't antsy or overeager - just bored. But he's had the feeling of being watched for a few minutes now, which might be a concern if not for the identity of the person intermittently trying to stare a hole through his back- "That guy I told you about keeps looking this way." Client, he won't say in a crowded room. "I think he's getting nervous about me still being here."

Illumi pops the hors d'oeuvre in his mouth, casually. The money for this job already hit his bank account, he checked, so now he's nothing but a harmless party guest and it must be just terrible, being a paranoid client. He feels for the man, really.

"Ah," but also, "'A little slow,' though?" Must you.

If you're dim they'll have less of an interest to try and spark conversation with you, as well as try to interact or remember you at all, really- he's doing you a favour, sheesh.

"No, I guess you don't." A knowing smile. Allies are- useless for the most part but then- he finds his own reasons for them. Most of the time though? He helps because he just- wants to, and not because he owes them any boon. Illumi would be considered an ally he supposes- her certainly doesn't pay him as he does with Machi- infact, Illumi spends a lot of money on him. Though- that's due to his limitless supply and lack of any sense how money and saving works.

"Ah- so he is..." A bored look, glancing over Illumi's shoulder subtly. "Let him suffer, we're not making a scene hm?" But he'll meander closer to the exit to settle both the 'client' and Illumi's nerves.

"Since when did you care about how others saw you, hm?" Grins, tipping back his glass to finish most of it off in one swallow. "Besides, what interest would a woman have in some slow boy? I was thinking of you, really."

Do him a favor without calling him slow, maybe- just a suggestion. Remember, Illumi's middle name is "egregious self-importance."

"It's a pain," he says, for both the eyes boring into his back and being aware of how people see him. He runs a finger around the rim of the wine glass idly, making it hum, then continues in a somewhat lighter tone. "Work aside, this party is a waste of time. I nearly felt bad for the other old man- coming with me was the most exciting part of his night."

He tilts his head slightly as if thoughtful, then shrugs. What Illumi thinks about the people he kills for money, if anything, is anyone's guess. He doesn't feel remorse - ever - and it's as if he forms no opinion at all until after he mentally classifies them as "dead," despite their actual state of life or death. Of course, his opinions are largely just detached pity, empathy-free— but it does explain why he gets so chatty about dead people.

Ah, is this what they call a hobby... A beat.

"I'm not going to drink this." The wine; holding it out. "Want it?"

Well, when it comes to other people, he is a bit slow, let's be honest. You gotta recognize your faults there too, buddy, Hisoka does. He just embraces it all.

"Probably, I'm used to being the life of the party anyway, hm~?

"I do." Takes the glass, finishing his own and then drinking down the second, having two empty glasses, one in each hand. A sigh, looking to them. "I guess we really should go, we're really just crashing now. And I wouldn't want you to bother that guy anymore, right?" A pout.

"Pity, this was all I had planned for the night then- ope!" Sets glasses on a passing tray aaand takes a third glass. "Let's go."

No way, Illumi is totally great and also right all the time. All the time. Who needs self-reflection when you are always correct? Not this guy.

He already has his eyes on the door the moment Hisoka agrees they should go; finally. Were he someone with a slightly different set of priorities, he might enjoy lingering around after the job is done- something like an ongoing game only the client is unfortunate enough to be playing with him. But. Well. He isn't; it's money, without thrill. Too bad, it might have been interesting to work an elaborate con over on a more difficult job...

"You're just crashing, you mean," he helpfully corrects. One of them actually had reason to be here, so— good job, party crasher. "How was the free food?" He glances at Hisoka grabbing the next glass before heading for the exit. The closer they are to getting out of a crowd, the heavier the pin stuck in his head seems to feel; that much nen strain was definitely unnecessary, in retrospect. This skill can be so tedious.

As they finally leave, "I'm going for a drink." A better drink, somewhere else. Sparkling wine isn't for him.

"Am I? But I'm a plus one!" Hey man, you asked him to come. "And it was all right, I've had better- same for the liquor." His eyes sparkle a little at that last comment. While Illumi was self centered, elitist, easy to read, and naive, he had good expensive tastes. All the Zoldycks seemed to. So he's sure that means quite a nice place. Usually when Illumi asks him to meet somewhere, it's always way above Hisoka's budget, not that the Hunter's license he has right now doesn't help. but he still can't be buying 60 year old scotch every time he goes out.

"You prefer to keep company then? Or should I leave you to celebrate you're never ending success alone?" Honestly, he's never sure about the answer to that question whenever he asks. He feels like he can read Illumi rather well but when it comes to illumi wanting his company? Well- the only time he knows it's a 'yes' is when he wants something from him.

That of Hisoka follows along anyway.

Crashing with permission is still crashing. Illumi didn't exactly have the authority to bring a plus one at all, but whatever- it went just fine. He waves a hand dismissively. "An assassin's plus one. Never mind, no one could tell you weren't supposed to be there." His gaze flicks to Hisoka briefly as they walk, appraising; he doesn't understand how Hisoka does it and likely never will, but he can't deny it's a talent that comes in handy. Not that he wants to replicate it for himself, no - he doesn't call Hisoka to meet him for his health. Definitely not.

But, ah, company... His mouth curves downward subtly, not quite a frown but a considering expression. This feels like a night where he can assume Hisoka will follow him even if he says no - the hair and the suit, and not nearly enough people have looked at him in it, Illumi guesses - but it also isn't a night where he needs to refuse in the first place. Sometimes he's busy, but well, that job took less than an hour.

Or, more succinctly: he sure is going to lay down the money for exorbitantly expensive liquor, so why not. He shrugs one shoulder, touching his hair where it covers the needle. "You can come. I need to get rid of this thing first, though."

"Need to? Hm? Can't handle it anymore?" He's testing him. He could just say try keeping it in, test yourself, train your endurance for keeping it in, something like that. But Illumi will most likely dismiss that as silly, why bother right? He doesn't need to, so better conserve his strength. So instead Hisoka words it differently, making it sound like he's questioning how weak the other man is.

"Should I change then, or are we going to head right there?" Yes, he looks dashing, he doesn't plan on changing either. He he does it, no one knows, how he manages to stay somehow........ charming, despite being as strange and eerie as he is- well, we can just never knows. Most of the time though, he keeps his urges inside, occasionally showing flashes of them. Otherwise?

Pretty cool as a cucumber. Confident. People like confidence, and really, he has the power to back it up, he is rather amazing.

"I hope no where too far, I really don't want to ruin this suit, I've barely gotten anything out of it." Grins, glancing down to himself and adjusting his cufflinks as he tosses his now third empty glass away as they step out. It falls to the ground behind him, breaking. "I dare say I could win over some further company tonight once you get rid of me."

Oh, okay. Be like that. Illumi's hand in his hair stills for a moment, but then he goes back to poking at the needle anyway. Hisoka might be making it sound degrading, but there's a sense to it. Objectively, he can still handle it just fine—having to is something else entirely. And expiring too much nen to prove a point is- well, silly, yeah. So, "It's just a drain on me now. And I don't like my hair short, anyway." Enjoy it while it lasts.

"Ah-" 'Too far,' about that- "Maybe I should have brought a car. It's a couple blocks..."

His attention is mostly on the needle, still, as they head up the sidewalk. The needle, and looking for a dark corner to duck into to yank it out. When he takes his hand away from his head his fingertips are clean, of course - the punctures from his needles don't bleed, as much as they are definitely needles and he definitely has a good inch and a half of one shoved into his head right now. Getting them in and out without bleeding all over or even leaving obvious marks is one element of the skill he's definitely mastered; assassin training helped.

Meanwhile, he's not interested in Hisoka's escapades, but, "You're welcome for the suit, by the way."

He should is what Hsioka is trying to say. Forcing himself to endure it so it becomes easier each time is the point. That's the only point to be proven but to an end, it'll help him hone the ability, not doing so will mean taking much longer to become good at it. But so be it, Illumi doesn't seem to enjoy listening to him for much.

"A drain? Will you be using your powers for anything else this evening?" His eyes slim, smiling wider. "Did you plan more to surprise me? Oh you scoundrel~" Chuckling to himself and swatting a hand lightly.

"MMnnn- a couple blocks." A sigh, frowning, but he shrugs up his hands. "Can't be helped, that's really not too far. And it's more time we can spend together~~~" Follows him, standing nearby and casually looking another direction.

"Hm-" Nods, closing his eyes. "Right a stickler for manners, thank you so much for the clothes and inviting me, Illumi. It's been a real treat." Tilts his head back, looking back at him and smirking. "You know how I value our time together."

Maybe when he's at home on murder mountain, but in the middle of the city he can't be bothered to stop somewhere to sleep if he overtaxes himself. They're never going to agree on his practice schedule.

To that end, a closed-off shop front provides the suitably deserted space he needs to sidestep into the alley next to it and drag the needle out of his head. He stashes it in an inside coat pocket as his hair moves of its own accord, lifting slightly before falling in a dark wave down his back.

"Much better," he says as he steps back out again. Now that that's done, he can stop blatantly ignoring... a lot of what Hisoka is going on about. He tunes back in around 'manners' and tilts his head. If asked if he actually enjoyed hanging around with Hisoka as much as he does—he would of course be obligated to say something about how he doesn't do anything that approaches enjoying being around people outside the family. However, given as much as he does, in fact, voluntarily do it...

Well, there are worse people to have this kind of arrangement with. Not that he'll say it. Assassin rule.

"You say so often enough. Sometimes it gets pretty repetitive." Y'know, because no one else talks to him- details.

Aww why not, they could get a hotel~

"Oohh-" A low whistle, brows up, eyes wide as he watches illumi's scalp twitch, his hair growing, able to hear the slight strain through the follicles in his skin should he listen close enough. Always fun to watch, always interesting. He offers a smile as Illumi steps back over to him.

"I like your hair long too, doesn't feel right without it." Aiming to try and sweep fingers through it should Illumi not pull away. But the gesture is very brief, won't linger, he'll stop at being given an inch...

"Maybe you should lead more interesting conversations then. For example, where'd and what did you have in mind for drinks?"

Okay, but he might actually draw a line at the inevitable room service and minibar bill when Hisoka takes thorough advantage of Illumi's wallet— maybe. Like, somewhere there's a line, it's just hard to find...

He does allow the touch to his hair though, in the sense that he allows it for about a second- it just so happens that he leans his head the other way around the same moment Hisoka takes back his hand. Yes, his hair is very nice, but behave.

"Scotch." Of course it's scotch- it'll be the best one, though. Speaking of repetitive. "We're going to Dark Moon, the one across from that Holden hotel. Do you know it?"

Hint: it's almost entirely purple inside.

Okay okay, they can stop at a liquor store beforehand and get some stuff so he doesn;t go overboard at the minibar and fridge, all right? He can cooperate.

Behave?

Wow, don't tell him what to do. He can behave perfectly, it was just a passing touch, he's not jumping your cock or anything. I mean- you're just a 95~ Though you really have potential, kid.

Scotch, always scotch. Scotch because Illumi's an expensive as shit date. Sushi? Fatty yellow tail and sea urchin, entre? Filet mignon. See a movie? Has to be IMAX. Sheesh. But- he'll drink scotch, sure. He'll drink whatever Illumi's buying.

"Dark- M-" A small laugh, almost scoffing. "I do." Wow.

Is 95 not great anymore? Because it still sounds great. Listen, his hair is a precious commodity and he just doesn't appreciate hands being all up in it without his permission. Explicit permission, that is - don't take a mile from that inch.

"What?" No really, this is a great place he's chosen. The black lights, the purple everything... What's not to love? "It's a nice place."

It was great for like, other people, other people great. But compared to his OWN score? He deserves to touch more hair too- but as said! He'll take the inch but he won't push for the mile, he can be patient- not that he ever thinks Illumi would let him take more than those moments.

"Sometimes you're just- amazingly transparent is all." A smirk, moving to head in that direction without another word. He really was, anything purple and- he's just won over it seems. Hisoka can't really say he's any better when it comes to certain things either.

"You've been there before then? You drinking alone- how sad."

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