dumbshow | once more with shitposting

once more with shitposting

[Reim is loath to think it's convenient that the city needs to be put back together after everything. There's been so much loss, they've all felt it—but having something to do after Pandora is dissolved keeps everyone's minds off those things, more or less, so. It's a little convenient. It keeps people busy, himself included.

Most people, anyway... Reim has more than enough to do, from ironing out the details of the relief efforts (it's-not-Pandora-but-it's-mostly-the-same-people is not a viable organization name, the struggle) to dealing with people on a much more individual level, including trying to integrate the remaining Baskervilles— he's never been more stressed in his life!!

Unlike some people apparently on a quest to ruin the only peace and quiet he has in his schedule - locking himself in his office to eat meals - in between everything else. It's just after he's been to check up on Duke Barma, who is surprisingly... robust, if bedridden, and he's escaped that harrowing exchange only to find his office invaded and some kind of food out. It smells like food. That's not the lunch he ordered??

He sighs. It must be every day of his life at once. He will address... the office:]

Xerxes, come out of there.

[he doesn't even know where, but he Knows it's somewhere.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Everyone in Pandora was a little in love with Reim? This is not so far-fetched.]

He's quite competent at doing nothing, I suppose.

[your dad sux]

[Ah, most of them are middle-aged, too. Everything is illuminated.

Reim pinches his side, lightly. Stop talking shit.]

I'm not asking you to adore him, just let him be.

Clearly, I am still going to tell him everything.

[God... No, he can't do that now. That'd mean he'd have to mention how he's leaning his head back against him, pouting.]

You're going to do great things, Reim. I always knew you would. Don't worry about it so much, hm?

[Please don't get along with Barma at all, just avoid him at all costs... he's bedridden it won't be hard.

That Terrifying Concept aside, if he stops worrying, his brain shuts down, so maybe some other time.]

Great things...? As long as they're not nearly as exciting as helping to save the world, I'll look forward to it. [He's even got this cute boyfriend now? Everything's coming up Reim.] And of course, I'll have you here to... well, I'll have you.

[cranky old people don't help??]

[Um, this is insulting? Clearly he can do something helpful, like...]

I'll.... [like...] I'll help you... [he's cringing now] I can teach you how to defend yourself, for once.

[pictured: Reim, on the ground, Break, complaining while waving his cane. This would go well.]

[Ew..... that sounds like physical activity...]

I'm not so sure... [he doesn't want to have to dump Break for an afternoon?? Think of the real consequences here.] You are the one who always made so much noise about how ill-suited to combat I am, you know.

[please do not make him hold a sword]

That was when no one knew you were very important. [That sure is a nice thing that nice boyfriends say. But like, he has? A point?]

I'm not always going to be around... if someone were to try and just end this family line, I don't think saying kind things is going to work like it did on that child.

Well, technically... [He's not actually a real Barma?? That line died the moment Rufus Barma never gave up on his teenage crush. Anyway, this kind of talk is going to give him an ulcer, please don't.]

I know you know her name is Lily. Please don't antagonize her. [Please, god. Break doesn't have to adopt her but please be fake-civil to the 10-year-old girl.] As for your idea, I will think about it.

[Read: always be too busy for it, darn, next week??]

[That child would have killed Reim and wanted to rip his body to shreds? He heard that when everyone was pretending he was actually dead. He's bitter.]

I won't antagonize her if she doesn't visit. [He sighs, turning his head away like there's something more interesting to pay attention to. There isn't, he's just a brat.] You're robbing me of things to do, Reim... I'll have to spend all my time in your arms.

[No, it's fine, she's good now? She's also like 10, which probably excuses her... trying to kill him... he did shoot her in the head. God, he's not going through the whole list of events again just to prove a point.]

You've made it to your age with no hobbies besides antagonizing people around you? No wonder you haven't made any friends. [he loves you but holy SHIT] I can write reports around you.

I don't have any other friends because they're all idiots. [Every single one. Gilbert? Less of an idiot than the rest, but still very dumb.]

Can you, really? I can be so very distracting. [he will kiss... so much]

[Shut up, Gilbert is a dazzling young man?? Very good at knitting and stuff. Reim tsks, disapprovingly. Be nice...]

I've managed to work hard despite your interference for this long, so I daresay I'm quite the expert in it now! Give it your best shot, Xerxes.

And yet you're out here with me instead of getting back to work. You've always endured it as my best friend, not... [This?? He doesn't know what to call this, so he just doesn't finish that sentence. He'll stop being 12 someday.

He hums, then instead of making the effort to lean up, just pulls on Reim's shirt until he's the proper height for another kiss. His efforts of keeping his distracted aren't going to work from sheer laziness, but like, he can dream.]

[call him ~LOVER~]

You wanted me to make time— [So clearly he's making it right now? He'd be back inside working if all the kissing hadn't happened all of a sudden, so alright, fair point... but never mind that, now that there's even more kissing to be had. He makes a noise, not really protesting, when he's suddenly pulled down, but he leans into the kiss easily enough.

This...... doesn't count as proof of anything, he could go do paperwork at any time.]

[Yeah go do that paperwork instead of this Reim... That's a thing that will definitely happen. Break doesn't prolong this kiss like he had the first time, but he does follow it up with more between breaths. Break couldn't stop grinning if he tried- he's just so elated that he can do this now. He also can't remember how long he's wanted to.]

You haven't had much practice with this, have you? I'll have to catch you up.

[New house rule, limit the amount of cute boyfriend things Break is allowed to do in one day?? Reim's too delicate to take this, and he was doing so well without getting super flustered...]

Y-You...!! [menace, the worst, dumped] You'll have to be appropriate.

[Currently, they are outside. But also he's a big fussy baby.]

I don't think you fell for the right person if you wanted someone appropriate, Reim.

[What was he expecting?? Break's not going to get any less embarrassing, so just bear it and love him.]

You're blushing, aren't you? I can't imagine how red you'd be if we were inside.

I am certainly not. [Maybe a little? Don't touch his face, his secret will be safe.]

Perhaps we should go back inside. Appropriately. I do have things to do before you can monopolize the rest of my time.

[Let him touch paper first or he'll go crazy.]

Why can't we go back inside inappropriately? [He drops his head on Reim's shoulder and sighs like this is the worst thing in the world, snaking his arms around him like he's not letting him go anywhere.]

I'll go back inside with you now... if you let me kiss you at the door.

How is the door any different from here...?

[He's exasperated by this apparent inability to just get up and walk, not genuinely wondering about this wild change of scenery. Worry not, the pettiness never truly goes away.

As such,] As much as I enjoy having you here like this, I will not be carrying you back inside.

[Win some, lose some?? He'll smooch at the door.]

What good are you if you won't carry your lover?

[He is the worst boyfriend? Just give him another minute of sitting here, he's so comfortable... Truly Reim is being wasteful by not taking advantage of his size and letting him stay that way.]

You still have to be done before sunset. [He finally grumbles, dragging himself off Reim to stand up. He never should have left that bottle of wine somewhere? He needs it.] I'll be on a couch... somewhere.

[He'll be ready and available by the evening to be crawled on like talking furniture, thanks?? He reaches for Break as he stands, sliding an arm around his waist to tug him close.

So basically the same thing they were just doing, but rearranged so he can move back to his paperwork. Details.]

Be patient for once in your life, Xerx. [zarks] It will be sunset before you know it.

[Literally, because he can't see it. But a clock probably chimes helpfully, somewhere.]

[There was some attempt to put his arm around Reim's shoulders before he realized how stupid of an idea that was. He settles for around his back, like it never happened. Shut up.]

Telling me to be patient is like telling you not to stress over the work. It won't happen. [He pauses.] ... I am sorry about the mess.

[his shitty grilled cheese and cookies]

The- oh, the mess... In all the excitement, I had forgotten what you did to my office.

["The excitement." A few smooches: excitement. With that mess misery fresh on everyone's minds, then, it's time to go back inside. All the way inside and back to work forever.

No, he stops at the door with an expectant hum. Thrill him, Mr. Competent Romance.]

[Excitement... uh, that was chaste? Break isn't going to say it, but he's thinking it all the way to the door. Where he's supposed to kiss him. Right.

He detaches himself from Reim's arm, moving in front of him to run his hands up his chest. He settles one over his heart and uses the other to trace the line of his jaw, taking a moment to picture his face in his mind before he leans up and kisses him. It isn't dissimilar from the first, this time - slow and deep - to savor the moment before he's left to his own devices.]

I am going to get better at this. [Not... this, but, in general.] So don't worry about anything but what's in there anymore, hm?

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