dumbshow | was i ever truly off my bullshit

was i ever truly off my bullshit

[When Kirin Jindosh's house falls into the sea, he almost doesn't realize it's happening. No alarms have been activated, no sensors in his floors alert him to the presence of an intruder; even the mechanisms of his house are silent as the grave, on this completely ordinary day. Were there anything amiss in his house, he would know... and nothing appears to be wrong.

He hasn't eaten in two days. It's unimportant, but he's pushed his hunger to the point of distraction and now needs to put something in his body before he starts to slip in his work. It's this that gets him out of his lab and skulking directly down to the kitchens instead of waiting around for someone to bring him food in the dining area; the cooks aren't pleased to see him in their space (it isn't theirs), but they never are, and Jindosh can eat a pear in peace for five minutes thanks to their studiously avoiding his gaze.

His cooks are among the best of his staff, all things considered. But so it happens that he is not in the high, ocean-overlooking part of his home when it begins to fall. He feels a faint rumble beneath the floor and pauses, head tilted to listen. Somewhere, something creaks. And then something tears.

All at once his perfect home becomes a place of chaos: guards abandoning posts, staff and servants running in every direction, the clockworks not knowing what to do with themselves in the absence of an enemy to put down. Jindosh himself moves like a spectre, the shock of his home's demise too great to spur him into doing something like moving more quickly. Against all odds it's a maid (he knows her face, Maybe if he had a family, but that kind of thing doesn't even occur to him, his home remembers) who sees the master of the house staring dully out of a window as it splinters and does something about it, grabbing his hand and taking off at a run before he can find his voice to object.

The house crumbles. Glass shatters, wood splinters and stone all but dissolves as if it were never the marvel of engineering it was built to be. Metal screams and snaps as it bends in ways it was never intended to and Jindosh has no words for the feeling he experiences as his life's work, years of work and decades of research, slip into the sea like they were never there. How? he wonders. How, how, how? No answer comes to him; his greatest defeat is this, and though he can see no enemy that caused this, he knows: his house is flawless, and if it falls then his enemy has bested him without ever appearing before him.

A worthy opponent, despite the consequences.

Outside the carriage is somehow still working, but it throws itself off its track when a chunk of his waiting room wall lands on the station behind it. Jindosh and the maid are tossed limply into the grass, and the maid scrambles to her feet to continue running while Jindosh sits up to watch his house fall to rubble and dust. He thinks he can see his silvergraph lenses glinting in the afternoon sunlight as they fall, but perhaps he imagined it.

He's still sitting there watching when the dust has settled. When a dark-clothed figure covering her face stalks toward him, says nothing to him as he looks up into the eyes of his own destruction, the Empress, says nothing as she tosses the cracked shell of a clockwork soldier's head into his lap and walks away.

He's still sitting there when the sun begins to set, on the hill, on everything. She may as well have just killed him, he thinks as he finally rises to go pick through his own rubble. It would have been more merciful than this.]

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You do have a choice. My company's just that great.

[He says, as if he hadn't barred him from leaving the Crone's Hand just the day before. What an incredible change of heart he's had over the course of one day... Anyway, he does tear a poor Howler away from their scouting for the very important task of going all the way back to their boat in the canal with their "uh... important contraband, yeah." He does take him to lunch, where he hashes out the explicit details from powering the painter's lift, to how many guards they'll encounter from then on, and how all things technical is kinda just left to Jindosh after that. In the remaining time until the sun goes down, he probably listens to how Jindosh knows the intricacies of the security systems, and probably interrupts to distract him with tales of murder in the taxidermy basement so he can stop hearing about Clockworks. Spare him.

All in all, he'd call it pleasant. He thinks back on how pleasant it was when he's suffocated another guard, dropping them with an exasperated sigh. They were always so much bigger than him... it's a trial not to make a sound.] I'm suddenly realizing... why no one robs the bank.

[This has all been a very exciting day but Jindosh in his fantastic new clothes is ready to rob some goddamn banks. He has indeed been circling back to talking about Clockworks over and over since lunchtime, and he'll keep the murder basement in mind for later, but the closer it gets to evening the more myopic he is about getting into the bank. At least some of what he's said about his Clockworks is actual useful information about how to get them out of the building without killing everyone inside (suspicious).

And now, on the roof, he stands idly by as he watches Paolo choke out the last unsuspecting guard posted up here. He does like it better already that he doesn't have to crouch behind a corner and wait for Paolo to come fetch him. Anyway: the door, which he opens and steps inside. He has the good sense to finally lower his voice, now that The Plan is underway,] I daresay no one else in this city is capable of doing it, given the security systems in place.

[His. His systems. Did he mention he is so smart? He gestures for Paolo to follow him down the stairs and step lightly over an unconscious guard and through another door. He knows where he's going.]

Or perhaps it's the smell.

[Gross... well the first stop is the model roaming the main floor, as the others will require a little more system rewiring to get to in the first place. The security systems in here are, naturally, programmed to consider Jindosh friendly, but only Jindosh - a fact he remembers almost a moment too late, holding his arm out to stop Paolo from coming into view as the ceramic monstrosity stomps slowly past.]

Do you hear that? Whose voice is that, coming out of my machine? I swear I should have never given this miserable building a second of my time... You wait here.

[He needs to go march up to this horrible machine and reprogram it, a feat that starts with Jindosh snapping a few verbal code commands at it and then some irritable tinkering. Just uh, stand there and make sure no one wakes up somewhere down the hall? Thanks.]

[You know, he should be doing that! Under any other circumstances, he would be making some quip over his shoulder while he occupies his hands with finding things that aren’t his. But Paolo hasn’t moved from where Jindosh stopped him, and he hasn’t taken his eyes off the Clockwork. His safety net is a sure thing, he knows, so he shouldn’t worry about what it’s like being on the end of one of those blades, but—

But look at it. It’s horrifying. He has to keep a grip on his sword to keep his cool, and he only finds his voice again well after it’s clear the thing it’s safe enough to speak.]

They’re... big. [He tried,]

Edited (Icon,) 2017-12-26 17:16 (UTC)

[It sure is a big blade-covered monster. Mercifully frozen in place since Jindosh gave it the command to pause all programming, it is at least not swiveling its whole torso around trying to cut Paolo to ribbons right now. But it's massive and the rewiring spot on these older models is not conveniently low on the leg, so as Jindosh stands there straight at his own considerable height, to muck around with it - it's just so tall!!

He looks over at Paolo eventually, like, yes? And?]

Of course they're big. You can see the merits of intimidation working right now, even from all the way over there. [small man, they won't bite (anymore),] Come here and have a look at it, since it will be skulking around your dusty yard for the foreseeable future. Don't dawdle, time is precious.

[come! see! his monster!!!!]

[He'd rather be thirty feet away from this thing at all times? It's easier to admire these things from a distance, when it isn't so apparent he's almost half the size of them. He swallows, rolling his shoulders and dragging his feet as he walks over - carefully, remaining behind Jindosh, like it could just up and do something at any moment.

He looks silly, peeking over Jindosh's shoulder, he knows. But he apparently values caution over keeping up appearances in the face of what he can't even begin to understand... if Jindosh weren't here, he'd probably have bolted.]

The... the bird head is uh... it's easier on the eyes.

[No, he has to come and meet Jindosh's estranged child. There are three more where this one came from, Paolo, get used to them. The machine isn't off but is effectively put into a sleep mode, which means that it's not moving but its grinning half-face is bent down to grin terribly in Paolo's direction.

This is the happiest Jindosh has been in two days, despite his continued murmuring about how terrible it is that someone re-recorded the machine's voicebox. Look at him, he's practically glowing.]

Oh, is it? Then I will pray that your underlings feel the same, and no one gets themselves in trouble cracking the plaster. [Not because they'd get stabbed, he'll take care of that... but because Jindosh might personally slap someone? He might. Anyway, he needs to make sure whatever he's done to this machine worked, so without any warning he turns and grabs Paolo's shirt to drag him bodily forward to look at the Clockwork.]

Hold still, thank you. [And then he taps something that wakes the machine back up, whirring to life and staring - sort of - down at Paolo from its full height. Jindosh pinches a few wires or whatever it is these machines that don't make logical engineering sense for the time period need to operate, and the Clockwork... offers Paolo a bank account in its pleasant female voice.]

Ah, you see! Almost perfect, for its early design and limited practicality... once I've time to change its speech back to what it should be, it will be... marvelous.

[Paolo knows he’s not going to die or anything, but he kind of wanted to the second Jindosh stopped being his shield from this monstrous thing. Mercifully, he doesn’t panic, standing stiff as a board and thinking about how much money he’s going to be making by the end of this job. When that isn’t enough to ignore how the face is just leering at him, he thinks about Jindosh looked happy, so maybe it isn’t that bad—

He jumps when the thing speaks to him, shooting a dirty look over his shoulder like he at least could have warned him? Somehow? Then he clears his throat and looks back up at it, going to wave a hand through one of the spaces between the legs and the torso. Not so tough now, huh...] No, no, then I can’t make jokes at them. Like how I’m making a withdrawal.

[Don't... do that. Jindosh swats at his hand to leave the poor machine's magnetic junk alone, then steps back without closing the wiring panel. Should he turn it off again...? This isn't his part of the plan.]

Please, don't patronize my work. When will your people be here to lift it out?

[It stomps too hard to walk out the front door...]

I'm just wondering how it... [No, now's not the time to ask anything. One, they're robbing a bank, but two, he really doesn't need a lecture even if they're not robbing a bank. He steps back, looking to where they came.]

They're probably still emptying out all the registers... They'll need it deactivated to take the pieces outside.

[Well Paolo, that's a good question, even if he didn't finish asking it,] Magnetic coils. You do know what a magnet is?

[Right, small man... He moves back to the wiring panel just to deactivate it again, then closes said panel and gives the machine an appraising look. Hmm.]

If they break anything... Do you pay them, or do you all pool your ill-gotten gains in some filthy upturned hat somewhere? Either way, someone will have to compensate.

[They're robbing a bank. Someone will have to give up their new money to fix his robot baby.]

[Wow, that's a lot of condescension in one minute? On top of being dragged around in front of this thing. Paolo sneers, patting Jindosh on the shoulder as he moves past him.]

Your funds are going in some filthy upturned hat somewhere if you keep that up. I pay them well. If they break your shit, it's because I told 'em to.

[This would be a lot more intimidating if he knew where he was going... He stops a few feet away, staring at a wall.] Don't dawdle, time is precious.

[Aw, look at him, he's bothered. Jindosh scoffs, looking over the Clockwork one more time before he turns and heads for the elevator.]

And here you were in such generous spirits this afternoon. I should think upsetting me at this juncture would be very... uncomfortable for you and your fellow criminals, Paolo.

[There is, indeed, a murder robot right there. It can take more than a few bullets. He raises his hand to press the elevator button, but waits so he can give Paolo a look to hurry up.]

That is not a threat, by the way; simply a statement of basic fact. Let's continue.

I think upsetting my criminals at this juncture would make you very uncomfortable.

[He knows that's really not true - he can easily make an escape, but like hell that he'd leave Mindy in such a tough spot. He takes a deep breath and shoves his hands in his pockets, skulking into the elevator somewhat defeatedly. He can be passive aggressive until the end of time, but it'll be better to change the subject, stroke Jindosh's ego.]

I don't know what a magnet is.

A little blood and viscera don't bother me.

[Ha... murder. They're heading for the basement, anyway, since that will be easier to walk directly into than the security office. Not that the office will be difficult, either, considering every piece of mechanical or electric machinery in this building is, uh, his—but it will be slightly more annoying.

On the bottom floor, there is of course the electric current, and Jindosh gestures at Paolo to stay there and wait again. Now, back to the important thing... from across the room...] In... simplest terms, my Clockworks are held together at the joints by an invisible force created using special coils.

[Oh, okay, he'll just stand here... looking cool, he guesses. He leans against the elevator opening and pulls his pack of cigarettes, just watching Jindosh at work while he relaxes. It's awkward, just standing around... should he have some words of encouragement, or is that patronizing? Hm. No.]

The little whale oil tanks power the uh... the coils, then. Or the gears that power the coils, or... [He sighs, blowing smoke away from him. He's out of his element here, and it's beyond frustrating.] Just remember to make the rest of those things not hostile, yeah?

[Jindosh will just... turn the floor off entirely instead of wasting time rewiring it, since a bunch of thugs will have to come down here and carry out another beautiful machine in pieces. He still doesn't motion for Paolo to come watch this time, though; he's already proven to himself that whatever he's doing to these Clockworks works, so it will be much quicker this time that he pinches a few wires and then deactivates the machine.

But there's a dude asleep on the floor like 3 feet away so he's not going to shout all the way back to the elevator. Paolo will have to wait for him to come back and push another button.]

Thank you, Paolo, I might have just forgotten the entire purpose of coming here in the first place without your guidance. [Please... Back upstairs they go.] Are you actually interested in the mechanisms that move the finest machines in the world?

You're welcome.

[He rolls his eyes, but he has something of a satisfied smirk instead of anything scathing. They're halfway done on the Clockwork front, and as time goes by he's getting more comfortable with the idea of those things patrolling his yard. He might be scared shitless by them, but that means other people will be... It's nice.]

I'd be more interested if you weren't an asshole about it. [He puts his cigarette out on the elevator wall, glancing back over to him with a doubtful look.] You talk about these rich choffers like they're the scum of the earth, then you turn around and talk to me like that. I know the world revolves around the great Kirin Jindosh, but take it down a peg, yeah?

[On a reasonable person that line of thinking would probably work; most people might respond to the verbal equivalent of a mirror held up in front of their own bad behavior and realize, yes, that's bad. But Jindosh for all intents and purposes is just an asshole - to wit, he scoffs and leans back against the wall, clearly not especially moved by this... effort.]

Ignorance offends me more than wealth, although there is an apparent correlation between them in this city that has no business existing. [But there's no time to get philosophical when the elevator dings and releases them to the office floor. Jindosh moves past Paolo and down to the double doors, stopping in front of the speaker.] But I daresay that on these particular subjects, I have earned the privilege of being a bit of a choffer.

[he's so, so smart, anyway next thing!!] There will be someone in there to open the doors, as no one would listen to my suggestion of an automated lock system... Are you ready to do some actual work?

[He must have his own special secret emergency code???? Sure?? Secret code speaking it is.]

[He expected as much out of him, so it isn't really a disappointment. He didn't start working with Jindosh because he was the epitome of kindness, anyway - he isn't going to get angry because he's full of himself.]

Actual work. [He repeats, leaning off the wall with an incredulous look. Yeah, knocking out all these guards wasn't real work, he gets it. What a dick.] Yeah, whatever you want. We playing pretend, or am I taking him out of the picture, or...

[not... murder? seems useless]

[Okay to be fair, Paolo has just been following Jindosh around since they got inside? He got a break, now it's murder time.

Jindosh leads the way into this office, at which point the poor man in the door control room takes one look at them unlike in the actual game despite there being a fucking window there, and correctly assumes something is wrong here. Jindosh waves off Paolo's question and goes right on by to find his babies.]

Do whatever you want, but keep it quiet.

[Keep it quiet, he asks. There was perhaps a few seconds of consideration for his request, but the sound of broken glass follows it shortly after. It isn't quiet to put a sword through a man's throat, but it is quick, and Paolo at least had the good sense to tackle him out of his chair before he had the chance to slam him the alarm button.

So there was a little noise. The glass, the thud, a cut off yelp of a poor security guard who probably needed a raise. It was also probably enough to awake the Clockworks from their sleep state prematurely. However, Paolo hasn't considered the hassle of all that, more concerned with the state of his now blood-spattered shirt when he opens the door and rounds the corner.]

You're damn right, I'm doing the actual work...

[In the other room, Jindosh is busy with one Clockwork he got to before it woke up, but the other one abruptly stands to attention and starts going on and on in its charming not-Jindosh voice about how breaking into this bank is the biggest mistake of your life and how regular clients have nothing to worry about.

It's actually quite annoying. It laughs? Jindosh is literally elbow-deep in ceramic parts right now and can't rush to stop the other one before it stomps out of the room.

But there's no one left to turn on the alarm, so,] Imbecile! Stay out of sight if you want to keep that smart mouth of yours.

[Maybe he can watch it spin!! That's fun!!]

[No? That's the opposite of fun? Paolo looked up from his suit the second it whirled around, and he regrets everything in his life that has led up to this moment. He snaps out of his surprise when it starts in his direction, promptly turning right back around the corner and slamming the door of the office he just broke into shut. He locks it, ducking behind the desk so he can't be seen through the lack of window.

But Jindosh didn't say anything about audio detection, so through the walls separating the rooms:]

Can't you just tell it to shut down?!

I'm busy! Just stay there, I haven't built them with opposable thumbs!

[And that door looks sturdy? Probably, it can't break down a metal door. But it will stomp back and forth in front of said door and scrape its terrible sword arms on it while continuing to ramble on about its important searching. Because Paolo is shouting and Jindosh shouting is Perfectly Fine, it's not leaving from this spot...

Jindosh may or may not take his sweet time just to let Paolo sweat a little. For taking up attitude, of course. But eventually he'll come over and deal with the upset Clockwork, after it's started trying to smash through the shitty window and its awful blinds.

He does leave it deactivated immediately outside of the door so Paolo can stare right up at it when he crawls out from under that desk. Hey.]

Now then, if you'll come out of there, we have to move my vault. [did he mention, that it moves,]

[Paolo sighs with relief as he rises back to his feet, having had time to realize he should maybe give thanks and admit he could have handled that better. But then he actually opens the door and has to face that terrifying face again, and all chances of it are lost forever. He glares around the Clockwork, carefully walking around its blades to step back into the next room.]

I think you're overestimating how much we can carry. [He does not know, he doesn't mean lifting anything,]

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