incredibly indulgent shipping post

[clockwerk]

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[howlarious]

[Paolo waits until Jindosh's hands are free before moving his own, cupping his cheek with the opposite grip of the morning. It was much softer, his thumb running over skin with fondness. There wasn't any attempt to prove himself; he's accepted he shouldn't try and be anything else here.]

Maybe I would. [He mumbles against his lips, before taking another kiss, finding they're just as addicted out of bed as they are in it. Being tender wasn't a part of what little plan he'd had, and yet here he is.] But I don't think even someone with your vocabulary could-- [Another, hand moving to run through his hair,] -- put it into words.

[clockwerk]

[Tenderness again, and this time Jindosh pushes himself off the metaphorical ledge and leans into it instead of pulling away. What is it like, what is it like, what it is like now to reach past tolerating Paolo, to move on from enjoying his company and find something more solid? Paolo cares about him more than he's ever known.

That's even true. So Jindosh kisses him again, and tilts his head slightly into the fingers in his hair, and scoffs as lightly as he can against Paolo's lips.]

My vocabulary... I want you to try, Paolo. [His hand finds the edge of Paolo's seat quite literally and he goes so far as to pull his whole chair closer.] I will make it very worth your while.

[howlarious]

Yeah...? [Paolo frowns, prolonging another kiss to avoid answering him. It wasn't out of discomfort, but like how Jindosh's nerves rose in the face of giving himself over in body, Paolo struggled in mind. It was easier to open up to him physically, he'd done that before. But not this.

He could ramble on in praise, say he's the finest gem in Karnaca, but he knew it wasn't what he wanted out there. No, it was the simplest words that came the hardest, making the on his hair grip tighten and his voice shake when he found it again.]

I think... [He doesn't cut himself off with another kiss, instead leaning his forehead against Jindosh's with his eyes cast down.] I think... that I'm falling in... in love with you, Kirin. [He paused, and as if he thought he might make too much fun, he went on.] I mean it.

[clockwerk]

[To say Jindosh hadn't expected Paolo's admission would be an understatement. He's completely taken by surprise and since Paolo has leaned in so close to him, he has no chance of hiding it either. In love with him? In love with Kirin Jindosh, Grand Inventor of Serkonos?

He almost wonders if he missed something, some incredible moment where Paolo confessed he often falls in love with men he barely knows who cut him open for study, but he can't even seem to think it without the whole of his mind snagging, caught on that time he can't remember. He has missed something. And so, Paolo—what has Paolo been doing all this time?

Jindosh can't think about it; he doesn't want his mind to spiral away from him and he's gotten better, he thinks, at being able to feel it coming and he can feel it now, so he doesn't think about it and he doesn't ask. He reaches up to touch his fingertips to Paolo's cheek, still silent, at a loss. What do you say to someone who's falling in love with you when you've barely made it past "okay" yourself?]

I can't... say the same. [And he can't make any promises, but the vice around his heart seems to want to.] You may add another item to your list of things Kirin Jindosh doesn't understand, but wait and see.

[howlarious]

I know. [Paolo says almost immediately, still exhaling in... relief? Yes, he's set the bar so low that anything short of rejection was good enough. He doesn't expect some miraculous revelation, some surge of memories he couldn't share. He was long since past all that.

He didn't want him to remember.. He didn't want his touch to be weighed down by it, and he didn't want those far off looks when he tried to take matters more seriously. He didn't think about losing him again. He just wants to laugh, even if he laughs like it's much harder to be doing it than the ones before. But he'll do anything to keep Jindosh off the spot.] I know, I know. Don't worry about it.

[He hesitates, then slowly reaches up to put his hand over the one at his cheek. He pulled it off him and to his lips instead, kissing the knuckles like he was some sort of gentleman. It seemed too awkward to kiss him after dropping something like that.] Don't worry about it.

[clockwerk]

[The gentleman kiss is a bit much, but Jindosh is too wrapped up in all of this to complain. He doesn't want to slip out of his mind again but he wants to know what Paolo knows- what Paolo isn't telling him. It's obvious now that there is something, and Jindosh is torn between asking and not, so he just sits there in silence as Paolo keeps telling him not to worry.

Hmm.] I... alright.

[He might not worry? Maybe? Right now he gently tugs his hand out of Paolo's grip, to... finish his pudding. Pudding he understands.

HmmmMMM.] You are something of a masochist, aren't you? [like, he's awful,]

[howlarious]

[Ugh, the pudding. Paolo was already going to give him space, but the puddling send him back into his seat. He won't kiss him if it means tasting it.

But, since Jindosh is stating the obvious here, he does get some of a smug grin back.] What gave it away? The scars, the tattoos? Fact I've been taking a boat here almost everyday to get stabbed? That's not exactly your hardest question.

[clockwerk]

[Look, he likes Paolo, but he also likes pudding. These things take time.]

I was thinking more that you're considering being in love with me, ["considering," he says, like it's a choice.] but I suppose you do make the rest of it obvious.

[howlarious]

Considering. [Paolo repeats, linking his fingers behind his head in some effort to relax. At least, as much as he can, with how he was still on this.]

We're both very bad men, Kirin. [He says it so casually, like this might be a fact to be proud of.] But not a lot of bad men have goals beyond two things: money, and hurting people. So if I'm considering being in love with you, it's because it's hard not to. Don't think I haven't tried.

[He probably shouldn't say the latter, but he probably shouldn't be putting his feet up on one of the stool's legs either.]

[clockwerk]

[Well, he definitely shouldn't be putting his feet up like that. Jindosh swivels in his seat to bump Paolo's legs with his own. Put those down.]

Most people have found it very easy not to want me. [See, he's just so much smarter than everyone, it makes sense... This is what Jindoshes really believe.] How many of your Howlers are pining after you?

[asking for a friend]

[howlarious]

[Wow, that's rude. He juts his lower lip out in a pout, but he settles for crossing ankles on the floor.]

No one I've been with has pined after me. I've satisfied a curiosity, but the rest? Too scared. [He doesn't really consider this being unbelievable, considering his reputation. He hadn't really thought about what he was in person so far.] Recruits try to get sweet on me before they know what they're dealing with. Usually go for each other, or try and woo my second. Don't blame 'em.

[clockwerk]

[Don't pout at him, god. He's... relieved, stupidly, to hear the truth under Paolo's incredibly misguided vision of himself as a ruthless criminal mastermind. Jindosh is sure he's that somewhere else, but in here he's a tiny hoodlum pouting over where he has to put his feet.

So they both have atrocious taste in people. At least that decreases the dating pool sample size... Jindosh scoffs, before he has to curse himself for even thinking like this.] How fortunate for all of us, then. I never did learn to share.

[Like, actually. More like "Don't share the dissected cat, Kirin."]

[howlarious]

[Jindosh is cute, even if he acts like he isn't. Paolo appreciates his attempt to make it sound like it wasn't a concern, but he's still smirking like he knows it is.]

Like I said, nobody can hold a candle to the fire that is Kirin Jindosh. [Paolo is bittersweet. He'll say things like that, but then nudge the stool leg again just to bug him right after.] And if they do, well... I'm already burning.

Finish your damn pudding.

[clockwerk]

[Paolo isn't cute even if he thinks he is. Jindosh nudges his leg again, pointedly. Stop that!! And he is almost done with his pudding, god.]

Don't rush me. You won't burn through in the next thirty seconds.

[It will be thirty seconds exactly before he puts the bowl down, because Jindosh is a jerk. There, he is now available.]

[howlarious]

[What a child. Except Paolo is also going to be a child, taking a minute to lean back over and kiss him again...

... He still tasted like pudding. He made a face.] You need to wash that down with whiskey or something.

[This is gross, he's kissing his cheek instead.] I could get some. Whatever you want. Just not apple cider.

[clockwerk]

[Paolo really is a child. Jindosh looks at him like he doesn't even know what he's talking about, until he remembers the complaint about the pudding earlier. Oh my god?]

Whiskey is not exactly my drink of choice... [What's wrong with his tons of wine??] Or beer. Anything but whiskey or beer.

[fetch,]

[howlarious]

You're nuts. That's the good stuff. [Paolo is so disgusted with his choices right now. Still, he'll muss his hair before he stands.]

No whiskey and cigars tonight, mm... [He paused, then clasped his hands together with his face lit.] I'll mix our special down at the Crone's Hand. You'll like it, 's got sugar and everything.

[He's much more excited about this than he should be. Off he goes, taking up the dishes back to the kitchen to make Void knew what. He's true to his word, though, taking the time to make their drinks himself before he's walking back with them.]

[clockwerk]

[Jindosh hums in mild disapproval and pushes at his hand—don't do that to his hair, he looked professional. He doesn't think about how Paolo being so... cheerful and happy makes his heart turn over. There's nothing to think about; it does what it does and he's accepted it now. Paolo is cute.

Jindosh is still seated at the same table when he eventually returns, but he hasn't gotten caught up in his work again. On the contrary, while he does have a notebook out, he's doodling something instead. Just a sketch, a rough sketch for how little time it's been, and at a glance it's just a torso but when he adds a star creeping over one shoulder it's definitely Paolo.

He flips the page as casually as he can when Paolo comes back, looking up to pre-judge these drinks. He is innocent and did not do anything super gay while Paolo was out of the room, no. Hmm.] You will tell me what that is before you make me drink it, right?

[howlarious]

[Paolo might have noticed if he weren't so wrapped in how great his drinks were, thanks. He spares a glance at the notebook, but the question is enough to throw him off the gay trail for now.] Nope.

[He sets a tall glass down in front of him, leaning against the table with an expectant look down at him.] Supposed to be in a short glass, but I like you. Try it. [He even put a cherry on top and everything. Love him while he's leaning to try and catch a glimpse at his "notes."]

[clockwerk]

I've heard, [Jindosh mumbles as he reaches for the glass. He'll be resettled in Paolo telling him he likes him every two minutes after he's had time to process that "love" part, so don't mind him for now. The drink he peers into, swirls a little, and then tastes with a small sip.]

It's sweeter than it looks. [Like some people in the room!! Ah, but he takes a fuller sip this time, and fuck it, Paolo can look at his gay sketch. He flips the page back to the right one and pushes the notebook at him, sitting back to stick his fingers in this glass to fish out the cherry. Charming.]

[howlarious]

[Paolo made the mistake of taking his first drink when accepting the sketch, choking and hastily setting his glass back down. Thankfully, he didn't spit up on the paper, instead tracing his finger over the lines of his own shoulder.]

You're sweeter than you look. [He counters, like his smile wasn't a million times worse. Let him spend another minute or two looking at this, it's so nice.] 's long as you don't put my ugly mug in it, it'll be great.

[Like he doesn't have a painting of his face in his office.] Maybe you'll learn my back enough to get it by memory.

[clockwerk]

[Jindosh hums and rolls his eyes, busy with the cherry. He's going to draw Paolo's face, he has no use for this drawing at all and even less for a headless torso, so he might as well like looking at it. But that'll be a surprise for later.]

If you can hold still and let me have a good look. It will take twice as long if you keep turning around to kiss me.

[Resist...]

[howlarious]

That'd be challenging. [Paolo muses, holding out the notebook so he could replace it with his drink. It takes him a moment to actually think about it.]

I mean... I would though. [He admits after another sip,] It's gonna change sooner or later, but... if you want.

[clockwerk]

[Ooh, sketch time... Jindosh's eyebrows go up instantly with overt interest. Yes??]

Once I've memorized it as it is now, changes will be no more than a small edit. Here, and in here. [He taps the paper and his own head in turn. It'll be kind of romantic, Paolo.]

[howlarious]

[At this rate, Paolo isn't ever going to stop smiling. Jindosh is awful for his image, but here he is, setting his drink down to stand and pull the shirt overhead. He carefully sets it aside on the table, then turns and straddles the chair with his back facing him.]

Gotta say, this is a lot nicer than what we usually do in here. [He reaches back for the glass, shoulders rising and falling with his chuckle.] I'm only doing this once, so make it count.