[It is... terrible of Paolo, honestly, that his bantering and failing to play at being offended and laughing makes something tighten in Jindosh's chest. He can say genuinely that he's never felt this mix of whatever it is for anyone before; maddening curiosity for what the witch Delilah and her followers could do with a touch of Void, academic reverence for Sokolov, even an adrenaline-fueled respect for the Empress in a fight before she committed her great sin against him—he's felt all of those passions before. But the minute clockworks of his heart stop dead and then start to tick again at a different tempo to see Paolo laugh and move to kiss him again.
He's awful. Jindosh knows this very well now. Of course, that doesn't stop him from sliding his arm around Paolo, over the stars on his back to rest between his shoulders, but he's simply terrible. He likes being kissed and Paolo likes him.
Ah—distinctly new, again. This is edging quickly from cut-it-with-a-knife sexual tension to something more like lovers in bed together, and for all the abysses Jindosh has wondered what it's like to fall into, he hasn't wondered about this one until Paolo.] How sentimental.
[No one can prove he's a hypocrite.]
Well, you're certainly very comfortable now, I see. [nailed it]
[There was a good thing about the breaks he allowed Jindosh to speak. He could just watch the changes in him with little in return. It's what he does. Despite his amused grin, he knows there's an obvious fondness in his eyes, but he can't bring himself to look away.
He should watch how low his voice is, lest he want to seem too far gone. But he didn't. He sounded so captivated when he replied so simply,] I am with you.
[Shit. Uh--] Of all people. [That's less sentimental, right? Right. He's just swallowing some pride, not out of nerves. He's bringing his hand up to touch the side of his face out of comfort for Jindosh-- Oh, he's going to curse himself later.] Are you?
[Jindosh adds Paolo looking at him like that and using that tone of voice both to the mental list he's making now of reasons Paolo is dreadful. The first words out of his mouth sound so simple, and yet they seem to pull the bottom out of his stomach.
Ah.]
With you, of all people. [It's cool and collected to repeat Paolo's words back to him, isn't it? Too late now.] Yes.
Cute. [Another on the list to make Paolo absolutely awful: calling him cute with a smile like that. A smile so sincere. Even when he was making no effort to be infuriating, he's sure he still is.
He'll make up for it in another kiss before he pulled back. He slowly sat up, running his hands down his sides as he moved back, marveling at every little detail as Jindosh had with him. He didn't need stars on his back to shine, for Paolo to look at him like he was a constellation to be discovered. How sentimental.]
I'm guessing the only oil you have isn't meant for this. [He settled between his thighs, his smile faltering at the thought of any discomfort to him. A hand on his thigh is firm, the other hesistant. Fingers hovered as he contemplated his options, then rested on his opposing thigh as he leaned forward.
The banter would have to hold again, because the first breach was his tongue.]
Cute? [Jindosh repeats flatly, frowning. That's somehow more annoying than getting distracted calling him beautiful—cute. Cute? Paolo is dreadful and Jindosh kisses him anyway, wondering how to begin counteracting his cute assessment.
He wonders less when Paolo moves away, relieved that he can take the moment to collect himself like an adult but already feeling the loss of Paolo laid over him. Feelings. He watches Paolo instead, curiously observing the way the man hesitates, his insistence on taking care of him. Paolo isn't treating him like glass anymore, even in this, so he isn't inspired to take offense... but it's interesting.
Regardless, if Jindosh is expecting Paolo's tongue it's not obvious by the way the feeling of it has him squeezing his fingers into the lone blanket and sputtering over a noise of pleasure. He's surprised then embarrassed about being surprised, and if Paolo calls him cute again he's going to kick him.]
[Paolo may not call him cute, but he's certainly laughing again. He raises his fingers in mock defeat, withdrawing from him and shaking his head.] You'll appreciate it another time, is then. I'll have to...
[... drop by and get oil. Was he really planning that far ahead? It was his turn to frown, however briefly, choosing to take his mind off of it by sliding his hands down. He massages the skin around his entrance, taking that achingly slow time to replace his tongue with his fingers.
If he didn't want to be treated like glass, he'd start with two. But hey, at least his mouth is free to be awful.] Be patient.
[Paolo is a nuisance, that's what he is... Jindosh frowns up at him for laughing, but his heart isn't really in it—he can't bring himself to be entirely bothered, when Paolo is trying to get him off. Eventually.
That doesn't save him from Jindosh giving him looks for being so slow, still. The longer they go on like this the easier it is for Jindosh's mind to spin wheels out of the moment, wondering this or that about an experiment he hasn't gotten to yet. He can't help it—Void knows he's tried. Which is why he clicks his tongue irritably at being told to be patient, like he could, and leans up on his elbow so his other hand can reach Paolo's hair again and grip it more roughly than moments ago as those fingers press inside him.
He makes another noise, shorter this time, shifting his hips to get more comfortable. Be patient. Honestly.] As if you would be patient, if I were to take you here or anywhere else. Would we have even made it to bed, I wonder?
[He's still making fun of Paolo for going to pieces over that massage, earlier. He's charming.]
You might be practiced in a lot of things, grand inventor, but not this. We would have made it. You'd probably still be kissing me... [Now it's his turn to be offended. Well, as offended as he could manage with Jindosh gripping his hair like that, and finding he likes it. His ears are burning red, and he can't seem to meet his eyes. He knows he's right. Pride won't let him admit it.
Since Jindosh is so impatient, though, he'll keep moving to avoid more embarrassments. He adjusts to him, pushing in until his knuckles met skin. He found a rhythm in loosening him, curling his fingers when hilted and spreading them as he withdrew..] You'll find there'd be a lot more burning you just wanted to sit pretty on my cock. Why don't you spend your time looking at me than thinking about whatever it is?
[None of this is going to make Jindosh any less impatient. At least Paolo can rest assured that he's so impatient because he's into this, aroused as he is and with his dick being neglected so Paolo can complain. It could be worse. The only change in his expression is the smirk he spares a few seconds for, when Paolo gets embarrassed. Now who's cute, jackass??]
Why don't you get on with it? [he says, and there's surprisingly no malice in it. Turns out rude banter gets him hot just like being called special, who knew. He pulls on Paolo's hair again, looking at him as requested as he drags his other hand down his own chest. He's totally winging it here, but as long as Paolo loses his edge first, it's fine.
Being seductive on purpose is weirdly difficult because of course he keeps thinking about it, but hey, it's not an experiment. Paolo's fingers have him shifting again for more, eager, but the look in his eye is nothing if not challenging.] Perhaps I should do it myself. Of course, you're welcome to avail yourself of a dark corner to handle your own needs...
[so charming,] Take my mind off the rest, why don't you?
You wanna do it yourself? [Paolo muses, managing a smirk that could easily be negated by how red his face was. His gaze undoubtedly follows Jindosh's hand, and there's no mistaking the grip tightening out of possession. He didn't get this far not to finish what he started.]
I don't think so. I think the only reason you're riled up like this is because of me, and you aren't getting off if I'm in some corner. [It may not damage his confidence, but it sure does send him in the right direction. It wasn't long before he was pulling his fingers from inside him, wetting his hand with saliva before stroking himself for the first time since... before they'd even started.]
Unless you've been touching yourself to me already. [He shouldn't be allowed to wink, and yet he does before he's dragging Jindosh's legs up on either side of him.]
[A little rudeness goes a long way and Jindosh eventually gets what he wants, so guess what backwards lesson he's learned from all this? Surely the smirk on his face makes it clear. He won't contest Paolo's claims, considering they're true except for that last one. That one he scoffs at, rolling his eyes and trailing his fingers out of Paolo's hair and down his arm.]
Now, now, what have I told you about flattering yourself? [Ah, now it sounds filthy. He hooks one leg around Paolo, insistently, in case it weren't already clear that he's so riled up.]
I don't think I'm the one that's gonna need help in a second. You... [Technically quite a few seconds, but still quickly enough. Paolo rests a hand on one side of Jindosh, using the other to line up before he's looking back up at him. One, maintaining eye contact with him was surely attractive, but two...
His brows were still furrowed in concern for as long as it could last. It didn't hold out as he pressed into him, fingers balling into that lone blanket and jaw going slack. He didn't stop at the tip-- god forbid, Jindosh would probably yell at him-- instead pushing until his hips could go no further.] F-Fuck...
[Paolo's right at least that Jindosh would yell at him for slowing down now. Still, this is—this is a lot more than just his fingers, and Jindosh squeezes hard around Paolo's hand on the blanket as all ability to make wiseass comments goes out of him. Just for now—]
Paolo— [He seems to have forgotten how to breathe, draws in a shuddering breath to remind himself, and fumbles for a more comfortable grip on Paolo's hand while gets accustomed to actually being fucked. Sassy comments restarting in three, two...] Well, it's taken you long enough.
[He says things like this and his voice is already strained from the feeling, but he's still looking at Paolo with a spark of desire in his eyes. Come down here and kiss him, or- or something—] Touch me, while you're staring.
[Paolo can't do much more than laugh at the comment this time, seeing as he's struggling to find words with what he's feeling. He fits his fingers through Jindosh's again, his grip relaxing the longer he's settled against him.
Again, it didn't help the fact he didn't want to be called a dog when he followed orders so easily. He moved over him, catching his lips with his as he started moving his hips back out and into him again. It gave him time to think on what to say, but it's hard when his mind is so hung up on the fact they'd actually got so far and it feels so good.]
Kirin— [He didn't think of much of a comeback, it seems,] —I won't wait again, fuck...
[Paolo can't deny being a furry, unfortunately. Or: Jindosh's breath comes up short again when their lips meet, kissing hungrily and using Paolo's mouth to muffle the groan that slips out of him now. He's briefly torn between snaking his free arm around Paolo to hold him close to his lips or reaching between them to stroke himself, but the latter wins out after a couple thrusts.
Paolo is so... Well, he's still getting what he wants, so it looks like he was right when he said Paolo has belonged to him all along. He'll spare him the obedient dog comments for now, chasing his lips to kiss him again and then murmur against them,] At least you've learned.
[Paolo frowns against his lips, not at his words, but at realizing where his hand had gone off to. A grave oversight, one he hadn't made since he didn't have the lines of his face and the stars on his back. He trails his hand down Jindosh's arm until he pulls at his wrist, guiding his hand back to Paolo's skin as he replaced it with his own.]
Patience goes a long way. [He replied in a less than steady voice, kissing the corner of his mouth with a muffled moan against his skin. He'd wanted to spend his whole time with eyes open, but he finds himself shutting them as he finds a rhythm in his thrusts.] You... you alright...?
[Oh—there's Paolo, nudging his hand away. Jindosh laughs, one short scoff muffled against his lips as he obligingly slides his arm around Paolo instead, then, option two. It's going to hurt later, he knows, but it feels good now and being so wholly enveloped in Paolo is intoxicating.
Like, he's still laughing at him for feeling the need to stroke his dick for him, but he's not going to complain. That frees up his attention for other interesting things to try like rolling his hips into Paolo's thrusts and trying not to make too much noise.]
—Fine. [yes, he can even mostly breathe] I am perfectly fine. Don't even think about having second thoughts...
Second thoughts. [Paolo repeated, biting back a laugh of his own. Unsuccessfully, though, his shoulders shaking and his lips curving against Jindosh's. He couldn't help it, as he couldn't remember the last time he had so much.
As reluctant as he was to admit it, the man made his heart race, and... something more. Whatever it was, he hadn't felt it in so long that he was happy. Overjoyed. Elated. More words could describe this feeling, words he'd have to search for as he scanned the selections of Jindosh's libraries when he ultimately came back early or... or stayed.]
You think I could have second thoughts when you feel this good? [He leaned his forehead against Jindosh's, hovering his lips over his between labored breathing. He had to keep boosting his ego, as if stroking his dick with vigor weren't enough.] When you're all I can think about no matter how hard I try? I've tried, Kirin. I can't.
You don't have to lift a finger to make me lose a train of thought, and I hate it, because you're so damn smart about it... [And yet he was giving more material for Jindosh to make fun of him. Smart.]
[Ah—he'd only meant to get Paolo not to start fussing so much over his comfort that he stopped now, but stroking his ego and his anatomy at once is an interesting plan. His eyes widen a fraction, like he hadn't considered just how attached to him Paolo actually is. He hadn't, not really—not much beyond the fact that he'll do anything Jindosh says and how badly he's wanted to get him in bed all this time.
Beyond that has eluded him, either because he never bothered enough with feelings to know or because he knew just enough to ignore the obvious conclusion, out of fear and nerves. But now, well...] Bold words for someone in your position.
[Banging him, being a guest in his home? Something like that. Jindosh rocks his hips up again, shutting his eyes for a moment and sighing out his pleasure as he makes an effort to keep up with Paolo. Then his hand finds its way into Paolo's hair again, pushing their lips back together for a kiss.]
I have no intentions of stopping, [he says, voice low.] so you would do well to get used to it soon.
[That sounds... harsh, as always, and he can't articulate the feeling in his chest but maybe he can edge closer.] You've changed something, Paolo. I... [want him to stay? Too close.] I will even let you have that robe for when you stay the night.
[Paolo was drowning again. There was no other explanation for the tightness in his chest, or being so out of breath that he was kissing Jindosh like he was air. He was much deeper in the sea this time around, tide pulling him in again and again until he didn't have the energy to fight it anymore. It's what he got for going this far.
But the harshness doesn't make him regret wading out, especially not when it's followed by that. He expected he would get away with spending the night, but an open invitation? He chases his lips yet again to suppress the totally unrelated moan after it.]
I-I'd... [He takes a breath, lest he want to find himself stuttering again. At least the roll of his hips were more confident now, driving home with more force than the last.] I'd like that. Staying. I'll take care of it, I'll... [take care of you, he wants to say. But that is too bold.]
[Once again, Paolo goes to pieces over him, and Jindosh can only watch in muted wonder. There's the physical feeling, of course, and for as good as it feels to have Paolo over him, touching him, losing himself in him, Jindosh still feels distinctly more in control.
He wouldn't be if their positions were reversed, however, so he'll resist scorning Paolo and instead hold his head close, kissing at him between heavy breaths and the trembling movements of his hips he manages to meet Paolo's with. It's not a surprise at all that he likes hearing Paolo stutter over him, wants to unpack that tiny bit of vulnerability and discover whether he can see himself in there...
But at the same time Paolo has changed something, altered the rules of the game to make Jindosh's heart turn over at the sound of his voice, at the prospect of him really staying the night. It makes him nervous.
And yet he wants all of it, and not just because Paolo is making his whole body hot and trembling and wanting. So.]
I know you will. I'll hold you to that. [Another kiss, for emphasis,] You're mine.
I'm yours. [Paolo confirms, as if he really needed to. It's more of a reassurance to himself, that belonging to someone wasn't bad. He was his own for all this time, guarding himself, and now to give himself over to someone who showed no hesitation in inflicting pain?
Needless to say, spending the night was just as nerve-wracking to Paolo as it was Jindosh. But it's something he pushed to the back of his mind, to instead feel exhilarated at the prospect. It was easier to turn his mind off, to focus on the fact he'll be laying against him, to the way he allowed himself to tremble under him and actively pulls him down to lock lips. They didn't even have to kiss if he hadn't wanted.]
I'm yours, I'm yours, I'm yours... [He repeats, finishing each one with the brief kisses before he's biting down on Jindosh's lip. It was unintentional, hardly above enough to draw blood, but he sticks with it as his pace increases.]
[It was an itch to scratch, initially. Jindosh isnt cold or unfeeling—desire isn't something wholly unfamiliar to him, but this is more than the passing whim that he's ignored before. He thought it might be passing, that if he could take Paolo to bed once, he'd have satisfied that curiosity once and for all. And then he went and told him to stay and can't seem to stop kissing him, and Paolo has been under his skin for longer than he even realized.
So he's walked off some kind of cliff here, and as long as Paolo comes down with him, he'll figure it out eventually. He doesn't have to admit he's in too deep out loud. How could he, anyway, with Paolo kissing him again and again and giving himself to Jindosh in more ways than one, like he wants Jindosh's heart to beat out of his chest. His head is spinning; there are so many things he could say, declarations of his own to make that he could make, but Paolo is biting his lip and he can't think straight enough to speak even if he were able.
Then it's Paolo that his fingers curling in Paolo's hair are meant to say, Paolo when he tugs his hand free of being held to wrap both arms around him, Paolo when he tries to kiss him like this and groan into his mouth.
[Paolo had wanted Jindosh's heart beating out of his chest, but he'll settle for the fact he'd managed to silence a man that hardly ever stopped talking. He couldn't help but laugh over the fact, knowing it was unintentional, but it wasn't long before he ran his tongue over it to ensure it wasn't too hard.
Damn him for caring so much. But Jindosh— no, he was thinking of Kirin now, Kirin doesn't have to say his name to make him shudder with every action he took. Kirin is whose mouth he moaned into, whose body he took such care of. Kirin, Kirin, Kirin is what ran through his mind as he lost timing in his thrusts, becoming more erratic in favor of bringing him pleasure faster.]
Kirin... [Is what escapes his lips, said like he'd known him for much longer than they were familiar. Like he was the only thing he wanted in the world, like he was the only thing in the world. Karkacs was his life up until now, and Karnaca could wait.]
[There he goes, trying to take care of him again. Jindosh doesn't stop him, doesn't mock him for it, but it's all he can do to laugh in turn and press another kiss to the corner of his mouth. Paolo is sweet for a hoodlum, which isn't a thought Jindosh ever expected to have, but here they are. Paolo is sweet and he kind of likes it.
Well. More than kind of. But it's hard to focus when Paolo's control starts to slip, making him lose any brief shred of thought he was having about anything else. He's trembling again, holding tighter to Paolo and gasping. He's hot and cold at once, Paolo's body against his making him catch fire in a dozen places and the sound of his voice making him shiver—so much feeling, so much of everything.]
Paolo.... [He's drowning, he's definitely drowning. All of it is new and all of it (most of it—he will be sore later, but that's later) is good, and if he never has to let go of Paolo it will be too soon. The thought surprises him in its intensity, and he nearly says something else but loses it in another noise of pleasure. It isn't long before he comes with a muffled groan, squeezing around Paolo more tightly for how long it lasts before he relaxes.
Somewhat. Where does he look now, if not at Paolo's face with more emotion than he can handle? Soon all his fun neuroses will return...]
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He's awful. Jindosh knows this very well now. Of course, that doesn't stop him from sliding his arm around Paolo, over the stars on his back to rest between his shoulders, but he's simply terrible. He likes being kissed and Paolo likes him.
Ah—distinctly new, again. This is edging quickly from cut-it-with-a-knife sexual tension to something more like lovers in bed together, and for all the abysses Jindosh has wondered what it's like to fall into, he hasn't wondered about this one until Paolo.] How sentimental.
[No one can prove he's a hypocrite.]
Well, you're certainly very comfortable now, I see. [nailed it]
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He should watch how low his voice is, lest he want to seem too far gone. But he didn't. He sounded so captivated when he replied so simply,] I am with you.
[Shit. Uh--] Of all people. [That's less sentimental, right? Right. He's just swallowing some pride, not out of nerves. He's bringing his hand up to touch the side of his face out of comfort for Jindosh-- Oh, he's going to curse himself later.] Are you?
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Ah.]
With you, of all people. [It's cool and collected to repeat Paolo's words back to him, isn't it? Too late now.] Yes.
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He'll make up for it in another kiss before he pulled back. He slowly sat up, running his hands down his sides as he moved back, marveling at every little detail as Jindosh had with him. He didn't need stars on his back to shine, for Paolo to look at him like he was a constellation to be discovered. How sentimental.]
I'm guessing the only oil you have isn't meant for this. [He settled between his thighs, his smile faltering at the thought of any discomfort to him. A hand on his thigh is firm, the other hesistant. Fingers hovered as he contemplated his options, then rested on his opposing thigh as he leaned forward.
The banter would have to hold again, because the first breach was his tongue.]
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He wonders less when Paolo moves away, relieved that he can take the moment to collect himself like an adult but already feeling the loss of Paolo laid over him. Feelings. He watches Paolo instead, curiously observing the way the man hesitates, his insistence on taking care of him. Paolo isn't treating him like glass anymore, even in this, so he isn't inspired to take offense... but it's interesting.
Regardless, if Jindosh is expecting Paolo's tongue it's not obvious by the way the feeling of it has him squeezing his fingers into the lone blanket and sputtering over a noise of pleasure. He's surprised then embarrassed about being surprised, and if Paolo calls him cute again he's going to kick him.]
Paolo. Don't play at making me wait.
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[... drop by and get oil. Was he really planning that far ahead? It was his turn to frown, however briefly, choosing to take his mind off of it by sliding his hands down. He massages the skin around his entrance, taking that achingly slow time to replace his tongue with his fingers.
If he didn't want to be treated like glass, he'd start with two. But hey, at least his mouth is free to be awful.] Be patient.
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That doesn't save him from Jindosh giving him looks for being so slow, still. The longer they go on like this the easier it is for Jindosh's mind to spin wheels out of the moment, wondering this or that about an experiment he hasn't gotten to yet. He can't help it—Void knows he's tried. Which is why he clicks his tongue irritably at being told to be patient, like he could, and leans up on his elbow so his other hand can reach Paolo's hair again and grip it more roughly than moments ago as those fingers press inside him.
He makes another noise, shorter this time, shifting his hips to get more comfortable. Be patient. Honestly.] As if you would be patient, if I were to take you here or anywhere else. Would we have even made it to bed, I wonder?
[He's still making fun of Paolo for going to pieces over that massage, earlier. He's charming.]
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Since Jindosh is so impatient, though, he'll keep moving to avoid more embarrassments. He adjusts to him, pushing in until his knuckles met skin. He found a rhythm in loosening him, curling his fingers when hilted and spreading them as he withdrew..] You'll find there'd be a lot more burning you just wanted to sit pretty on my cock. Why don't you spend your time looking at me than thinking about whatever it is?
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Why don't you get on with it? [he says, and there's surprisingly no malice in it. Turns out rude banter gets him hot just like being called special, who knew. He pulls on Paolo's hair again, looking at him as requested as he drags his other hand down his own chest. He's totally winging it here, but as long as Paolo loses his edge first, it's fine.
Being seductive on purpose is weirdly difficult because of course he keeps thinking about it, but hey, it's not an experiment. Paolo's fingers have him shifting again for more, eager, but the look in his eye is nothing if not challenging.] Perhaps I should do it myself. Of course, you're welcome to avail yourself of a dark corner to handle your own needs...
[so charming,] Take my mind off the rest, why don't you?
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I don't think so. I think the only reason you're riled up like this is because of me, and you aren't getting off if I'm in some corner. [It may not damage his confidence, but it sure does send him in the right direction. It wasn't long before he was pulling his fingers from inside him, wetting his hand with saliva before stroking himself for the first time since... before they'd even started.]
Unless you've been touching yourself to me already. [He shouldn't be allowed to wink, and yet he does before he's dragging Jindosh's legs up on either side of him.]
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Now, now, what have I told you about flattering yourself? [Ah, now it sounds filthy. He hooks one leg around Paolo, insistently, in case it weren't already clear that he's so riled up.]
Imagine it, if it helps.
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His brows were still furrowed in concern for as long as it could last. It didn't hold out as he pressed into him, fingers balling into that lone blanket and jaw going slack. He didn't stop at the tip-- god forbid, Jindosh would probably yell at him-- instead pushing until his hips could go no further.] F-Fuck...
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Paolo— [He seems to have forgotten how to breathe, draws in a shuddering breath to remind himself, and fumbles for a more comfortable grip on Paolo's hand while gets accustomed to actually being fucked. Sassy comments restarting in three, two...] Well, it's taken you long enough.
[He says things like this and his voice is already strained from the feeling, but he's still looking at Paolo with a spark of desire in his eyes. Come down here and kiss him, or- or something—] Touch me, while you're staring.
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Again, it didn't help the fact he didn't want to be called a dog when he followed orders so easily. He moved over him, catching his lips with his as he started moving his hips back out and into him again. It gave him time to think on what to say, but it's hard when his mind is so hung up on the fact they'd actually got so far and it feels so good.]
Kirin— [He didn't think of much of a comeback, it seems,] —I won't wait again, fuck...
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Paolo is so... Well, he's still getting what he wants, so it looks like he was right when he said Paolo has belonged to him all along. He'll spare him the obedient dog comments for now, chasing his lips to kiss him again and then murmur against them,] At least you've learned.
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Patience goes a long way. [He replied in a less than steady voice, kissing the corner of his mouth with a muffled moan against his skin. He'd wanted to spend his whole time with eyes open, but he finds himself shutting them as he finds a rhythm in his thrusts.] You... you alright...?
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Like, he's still laughing at him for feeling the need to stroke his dick for him, but he's not going to complain. That frees up his attention for other interesting things to try like rolling his hips into Paolo's thrusts and trying not to make too much noise.]
—Fine. [yes, he can even mostly breathe] I am perfectly fine. Don't even think about having second thoughts...
[Which makes sense, really.]
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As reluctant as he was to admit it, the man made his heart race, and... something more. Whatever it was, he hadn't felt it in so long that he was happy. Overjoyed. Elated. More words could describe this feeling, words he'd have to search for as he scanned the selections of Jindosh's libraries when he ultimately came back early or... or stayed.]
You think I could have second thoughts when you feel this good? [He leaned his forehead against Jindosh's, hovering his lips over his between labored breathing. He had to keep boosting his ego, as if stroking his dick with vigor weren't enough.] When you're all I can think about no matter how hard I try? I've tried, Kirin. I can't.
You don't have to lift a finger to make me lose a train of thought, and I hate it, because you're so damn smart about it... [And yet he was giving more material for Jindosh to make fun of him. Smart.]
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Beyond that has eluded him, either because he never bothered enough with feelings to know or because he knew just enough to ignore the obvious conclusion, out of fear and nerves. But now, well...] Bold words for someone in your position.
[Banging him, being a guest in his home? Something like that. Jindosh rocks his hips up again, shutting his eyes for a moment and sighing out his pleasure as he makes an effort to keep up with Paolo. Then his hand finds its way into Paolo's hair again, pushing their lips back together for a kiss.]
I have no intentions of stopping, [he says, voice low.] so you would do well to get used to it soon.
[That sounds... harsh, as always, and he can't articulate the feeling in his chest but maybe he can edge closer.] You've changed something, Paolo. I... [want him to stay? Too close.] I will even let you have that robe for when you stay the night.
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But the harshness doesn't make him regret wading out, especially not when it's followed by that. He expected he would get away with spending the night, but an open invitation? He chases his lips yet again to suppress the totally unrelated moan after it.]
I-I'd... [He takes a breath, lest he want to find himself stuttering again. At least the roll of his hips were more confident now, driving home with more force than the last.] I'd like that. Staying. I'll take care of it, I'll... [take care of you, he wants to say. But that is too bold.]
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He wouldn't be if their positions were reversed, however, so he'll resist scorning Paolo and instead hold his head close, kissing at him between heavy breaths and the trembling movements of his hips he manages to meet Paolo's with. It's not a surprise at all that he likes hearing Paolo stutter over him, wants to unpack that tiny bit of vulnerability and discover whether he can see himself in there...
But at the same time Paolo has changed something, altered the rules of the game to make Jindosh's heart turn over at the sound of his voice, at the prospect of him really staying the night. It makes him nervous.
And yet he wants all of it, and not just because Paolo is making his whole body hot and trembling and wanting. So.]
I know you will. I'll hold you to that. [Another kiss, for emphasis,] You're mine.
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Needless to say, spending the night was just as nerve-wracking to Paolo as it was Jindosh. But it's something he pushed to the back of his mind, to instead feel exhilarated at the prospect. It was easier to turn his mind off, to focus on the fact he'll be laying against him, to the way he allowed himself to tremble under him and actively pulls him down to lock lips. They didn't even have to kiss if he hadn't wanted.]
I'm yours, I'm yours, I'm yours... [He repeats, finishing each one with the brief kisses before he's biting down on Jindosh's lip. It was unintentional, hardly above enough to draw blood, but he sticks with it as his pace increases.]
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So he's walked off some kind of cliff here, and as long as Paolo comes down with him, he'll figure it out eventually. He doesn't have to admit he's in too deep out loud. How could he, anyway, with Paolo kissing him again and again and giving himself to Jindosh in more ways than one, like he wants Jindosh's heart to beat out of his chest. His head is spinning; there are so many things he could say, declarations of his own to make that he could make, but Paolo is biting his lip and he can't think straight enough to speak even if he were able.
Then it's Paolo that his fingers curling in Paolo's hair are meant to say, Paolo when he tugs his hand free of being held to wrap both arms around him, Paolo when he tries to kiss him like this and groan into his mouth.
So, sex is alright.]
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Damn him for caring so much. But Jindosh— no, he was thinking of Kirin now, Kirin doesn't have to say his name to make him shudder with every action he took. Kirin is whose mouth he moaned into, whose body he took such care of. Kirin, Kirin, Kirin is what ran through his mind as he lost timing in his thrusts, becoming more erratic in favor of bringing him pleasure faster.]
Kirin... [Is what escapes his lips, said like he'd known him for much longer than they were familiar. Like he was the only thing he wanted in the world, like he was the only thing in the world. Karkacs was his life up until now, and Karnaca could wait.]
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Well. More than kind of. But it's hard to focus when Paolo's control starts to slip, making him lose any brief shred of thought he was having about anything else. He's trembling again, holding tighter to Paolo and gasping. He's hot and cold at once, Paolo's body against his making him catch fire in a dozen places and the sound of his voice making him shiver—so much feeling, so much of everything.]
Paolo.... [He's drowning, he's definitely drowning. All of it is new and all of it (most of it—he will be sore later, but that's later) is good, and if he never has to let go of Paolo it will be too soon. The thought surprises him in its intensity, and he nearly says something else but loses it in another noise of pleasure. It isn't long before he comes with a muffled groan, squeezing around Paolo more tightly for how long it lasts before he relaxes.
Somewhat. Where does he look now, if not at Paolo's face with more emotion than he can handle? Soon all his fun neuroses will return...]
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