laura (
appliances) wrote in
dumbshow2018-11-24 10:16 pm
highly new, slightly improved open post

assorted morons
optional prompts/ideas
☆ caught in the rain meme ☆ little steps meme ☆ affectionate physical contact meme ☆ picture prompt also acceptable but link them so it's tidy ☆ AU ideas: soulmates AU, reincarnation AU, Bad End AU, canon divergent/roleswap AU, dorky college AU, crossover AU, super indulgent high fantasy AU ☆ melodrama is ultimate tier ★ SHIPPING AND FUCC: ☆ non-fluffy relationship types I'm down for: codependent, master/servant power imbalance type ships, "we're bad for each other but worse for anyone else," other things I am failing to think of tbh ☆ things I am not into: noncon (includes "dubcon"), incest, tsundere shit if your tsundere is just verbally abusive, gratuitous torture porn, you'll probably have to ask me about harder kinks and they will vary by character ☆ I don't have a kink list so pitch me an idea if u thirsty ☆ if you would prefer a locked post I can also make that happen |

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Still, how should he go about answering that? With honesty, and how it's just not the same to only have his words and not his presence, only a carriage ride away if not in the same room? That's far more honest than simply I missed you, and Constantin can't quite pin down whether or not they're there yet. Maybe? Maybe a year and a half ago, almost, but while distance has more than made the heart grow fonder, it hasn't made acknowledging their situation any easier. Sure, it would be unlike Felix to treat him the way he does simply out of duty, hah, but what if...?
So Constantin has missed him terribly and can say as much, but the crippling fear of rejection is still there. All the same, he can't help but push a little. To gently nudge. It's delicate, but not so delicate that he can't say this:]
You did, and your letters were a bright star in that oppressive darkness! Yet I did miss you, and quite terribly at that.
[Now it's Felix's turn to read between the lines, while Constantin continues to look at him like he's the best thing to ever happen to him. In the past month, he certainly is! Please don't shatter his heart into a million tiny pieces!]
You might have liked it up there. [In the middle of nowhere, nearly, there is almost no fussy noble garbage because the only neighbors are poor farmers in the nearby village. Paradise.] If I hadn't been so cruelly forbidden to have visitors, that is.
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But it would also make things... realer, in a way. Would force him to confront things like, say, trusting another person with such an important part of himself, or facing the fact that said person is the one he's expected to spend the rest of his life alongside, and that's all very—whew! Whew. After pushing people away for years, is he ready to be so open, so... vulnerable...
...The impossible question, although there is a flash of something (guilt?) when he imagines how crushed Constantin might be if he chooses to say nothing at all. Constantin has as few friends as he does, but while it's never bothered him—while he has, in fact, preferred to go at things alone—he's aware that Constantin is... different. He wants to be liked, needs to be liked, and as stupid as Felix thinks that is, all it takes is the memory of a particularly bright smile to send him letting out a quiet breath. Okay! All right.]
Perhaps, [he agrees, seemingly skipping over everything that came before. Patience.] I hear the hunting is good. That it's quiet.
[Better than the capital, at any rate. People tripping over one another at every turn, doing their best to drown one another out in the process—but as he finally looks back up at Constantin, frown easing:]
Not that it hasn't been quiet here. No one talks as much as you do. [A burn? Admitting that Constantin-free is the way to be? No, no.] I suppose your letters made up for it, but this is... better.
["This" being talking face-to-face? Which... requires more reading between the lines, yes, but he's doing his best!]
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So that much is true. And then, ah—]
Oh, [he says dumbly, blinking first at Felix and then at his cup. Not that he's misunderstood; not that he wasn't hoping desperately for even the smallest of warm comments, indirect or not... but it's another thing entirely to actually hear it from Felix. Hypocrite that he is, insisting on his dramatics and then reacting like this to a basic "this is better"; a fresh blush creeps over his cheeks, brow furrowed, while he makes a face at the table like he very much wants to smile but can't quite get it out.]
Felix— I am so... so very sorry, for— for this past year.
[Because Felix missed him, even if he won't come out and say it, and Constantin knows full well what that's like! Because Felix might not care about high society niceties, but it can't have been completely smooth, going through the months after Constantin's departure with gossip all around about what a disaster his fiancé is. Because if he learned one thing while sulking in the north about his behavior, it's that his father can do him a favor and pass already, but for Felix, he should... Well!
The table is small enough for Constantin to reach across it and grip one of Felix's hands, more serious than he's been in the past, but with just the same height of Dramatics.]
Let's not dwell! I missed you, I have returned, and I swear to you right here and now that I won't let such foul business separate us unjustly again! [The foul business is fathers. He squeezes his hand and then, because they are not married actually, slowly lets go. Aha. But please believe he is trying.] ...I promise.
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So this apology is warranted, Felix thinks as he uncrosses his arms, bringing a hand to the top of the table so he can drum his fingers against it. A rude move that's earned him many a disapproving look? An open sign that he's considering how to hurry the current topic along—and yet it works in his favor this one time, because watching Constantin's fingers briefly close over his own is as electrifying as it is unexpected. Who would have thought that such simple contact would be so... well! Well. It's the result of Felix allowing absolutely no one close enough to touch him, but that doesn't explain why Felix feels the loss of Constantin's touch so keenly. Is this what he gets for saying something soft-ish... has he dug a hole for himself here...
Answer: Yes, especially when the first thing that springs to mind after a few seconds of silence is:]
...Then I'll hold you to it.
[Spoken a touch more quietly, a touch more seriously, than anything that came before it, but—hmm. He glances down at his hand, then back up at Constantin, unconsciously flexing his fingers as he wills himself not to dwell on it. It was only a brief squeeze of his hand, goodness, he's gotta be tsun about this posthaste—]
Even if you'll find trouble soon enough. [Ah! Perfectly Tsun™. But this is not a criticism, necessarily, because hey? Hey.] In your territory, anyway. There's little to be found in mine.
[What if... Constantin spent more time... in Fraldarius territory? Haha, just kidding... unless???]
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But that hardly matters when it doesn't happen, does it? Just the softer tone of Felix's voice undoes him, he's wound so tightly with nerves, hmm— Felix could bore him to tears about types of steel and Constantin would feel his heart get that much lighter, as long as he said it like that. Whew... the return to true tsun form is almost a relief for both of them.]
"Soon enough"! Don't tell me you— [are buying what his father is selling about how he'll inevitably screw up again, but wait, wait. No, hold on. It takes Constantin a second to realize that this is not actually a condemnation, stopping his protest short as the gears slowly turn. Ah...] Oh. Never mind.
[Ahem....... well then. No, he gets it. Whew.....2!!]
Are you offering to keep me out of trouble? If someone from your household were to request my presence, I could hardly refuse.
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You're not a child.
[By which he means that he isn't about to babysit him? Act ya age, Connie, not ya shoe size. Keep that promise in mind, because Felix is planning to take it every bit as seriously as he takes his own promises.]
I suppose I could speak to the old man, whenever he comes back from Fhirdiad. [Because something, something, a request from Duke Fraldarius would be all but impossible for anyone in Constantin's household to refuse? And his father has mentioned that it's time to bring Constantin into Fraldarius affairs, if only to allow the people to see them working together—and that sets his fingers drumming against the table in earnest. Marriage! The thing he tries his best not to think about! UGH.] If you're not opposed to work.
[Is riding out to settle property disputes better or worse than holding court? One involves Felix, at least.]
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...There is a negligible amount of babysitting. For all intents and purposes, he's an adult. He's not even politely embarrassed this time, unfortunately, because now the prospect of loitering- ahem, working alongside Felix is a very real possibility. His father won't refuse, he knows— as long as Constantin can keep him convinced that he is a totally changed man, letting him spend more time in a more well-respected household is an easy sell!
And, like, they're engaged. Constantin's parents don't care for each other and have never viewed marriage as anything but another tool, but for his part, Constantin is reluctant to use the engagement itself as a bargaining chip... hmm. He'll work it out, if need be.
That said: work, ew.]
What kind of work? [Not physical labor, he hopes? He knows what he is.] That is to say, I am hardly opposed in theory...
[He makes a face that is not entirely a pout, but getting there. Please don't make him do anything crazy. It passes, as he shakes his head to steel his resolve. To do work.]
But I intend beyond all shadow of a doubt to uphold my promise, so— I am in your hands!
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Kidding! Just kidding, even if that thought, when paired with Constantin's obvious eagerness to get his hands dirty, brings about the return of the world's tiniest smirk. Lazy, whiny Constantin will undoubtedly be annoying in the moment, but for now, Felix is still riding the mild high of being back together.]
Hm. So you say now.
[Is he leaving it at that? Of course he is! With the implication being, of course, that the work is going to be very, very difficult and very, very time-consuming, because this is how Felix teases people he's fond of? He may not joke, but he isn't above poking fun at friends when he's in a halfway decent mood.]
Perhaps I'll drag you along to training, as well.
[Early mornings! Late evenings! Get ready!]
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Pros, cons? They'll both see when they get there.]
Training? [Ah, and he's clearly feeling more like himself now and less like a mope, because his voice most definitely cracks from Real Fear at the very thought. Training with his own master of arms at home was bad enough, way back when, but—] I have seen you train, Felix! I won't last to the end of the first day!
[What if- consider this- what if he just... watched! Admiringly! That would be better!
He sits back in his chair, hand raised to cover his eyes in an exaggerated gesture of despair. Dramatics(tm).]
If that is the cost, then it must be done... Remember me fondly, won't you?
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If you make enough of an effort. [It's easy to allow words like fondly to slip past him when he can be, uh, a tiny bit mean? In fact, he's not even going to think about it at all as he leans forward to finally swipe something (the world's tiniest finger sandwich) off a plate. Fuck utensils... he's a rebel...] Are you any better with a sword?
[Let the records show that Felix demanded to fight Constantin one (1) time, just because he's Like That, and it ended as quickly as one would expect.]
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His sword skills, meanwhile... If he weren't bad at training and built like a stick that gets tired after ten minutes, he'd be halfway impressive. As it stands, hmm, well. He has guards for a reason. He does, at least, drop his dramatic hand to frown thoughtfully across the room. Uh...]
I am... passable with a sword.
[By the standards of someone who doesn't know a lot about swords and so wouldn't know any better, he is passable with a sword. In a pinch he could stab a guy? Artlessly.]
You know my house is one of merchants, not soldiers... I am abundantly lucky I was humored with sword lessons alongside my cousin at all!
[This is an excuse, for sure. It's also the truth?? Points for honesty?]
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And he wonders, briefly, if that will help or hinder their working relationship, but—hmm. Better to peel apart this tiny sandwich than think about the uncomfortable m-word, so allow him to do just that! And then pull a face when he realizes the veggie-to-meat ratio is, like, three-to-one. Disgusting.]
Then I won't ask you to spar. [Which is very different from simple training, thanks. But a beat, as he drops his dissected sandwich on his little plate, before:] Maybe I'll invite your cousin along.
[Is this good or bad? Like, what if he kicks said cousin's ass?]
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Ah... you would?
[He has to think about this for a good long moment, in earnest; it's no secret to anyone who has ever met him that Constantin's love and respect for his cousin borders on hero worship, so what if Felix could kick their ass... Would that spoil his opinion of his dearest, most cherished relative, or— and let's be totally honest— just make him way more into Felix than he already is?
The answer is obvious to at least one person in this room, but maybe one day Felix will catch up. Constantin sips his tea.]
If my father has not demanded my cousin's presence for some diplomatic something or other, I could ask. You two ought to spend more time together, in any case.
[Specifically because dear cousin is the best cousin ever and can swing a sword good, not even because they're aaallllll gonna be family sometime soon.]
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...Yeah. Reasons. Absolutely none of which center around Felix's strangely selfish desire for Constantin to admire him for his accomplishments, because that's? It's? Pfft. He shifts in his chair for no reason at all. Other people's opinions are wack... mostly...]
Why? Hoping we might get along? [With the implication being that Felix... barely gets along with anyone, being the sharp-tongued individual that he is, but. He still cants his head to the side, pretending like he's considering this very, very carefully.] Maybe your cousin is less opposed to work than you are.
[Maaaaaaaaaybe he'll invite them to ride along for all of those petty squabbles—except he won't, because that means less time alone with Constantin. Hmm!]
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That said: teasing him about inviting them along is so cruel.]
You know my cousin is less opposed to work than I am. [this is Known Fact by Everyone] I daresay the two of us would be out of work entirely were we all three to ride out together!
[Potentially? A bonus? Dear cousin the diplomat literally cannot resist fixing other people's problems, which solves Constantin's not wanting to work problem... But ah, would that kind of besting bother Felix? Does he need to show off in all disciplines?
And more importantly, how can Constantin try to hold his hand with his cousin right there making faces!! Augh!]
Father keeps everyone at the estate hideously busy, I'm afraid.
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But Constantin doesn't need to know that, because Felix enjoys this sort of push-and-pull with exactly one (1) person. A sign of just how comfortable he finds this whatever-it-is...]
Ah. [That's an awfully knowing ah, but he just can't help himself.] But he'll spare you so soon after your return? Generous of him.
[He says it so, so sarcastically, always eager to trash fathers in one another's presence—but, uh? Maybe that didn't come off precisely as he'd intended it to, given the tricky subject matter? He's not quite sure, and while that normally wouldn't bother him in the slightest... it's Constantin he's dealing with here. Sometimes it seems as if there's an entirely different set of rules.
But what to say? It's trickier than he'd like to admit, so it's time to casually look out the nearby window, pretending like he's very interested in the courtyard beyond it as he Considers.]
...If you do come alone, you'll have the guest wing to yourself.
[Smooth! ...But true. Rodrigue stays in Fhirdiad more often than not, and ever since Glenn—well. Visitors are rarer than they once were, so throw a party, Connie.]
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Well, he's not going to make a scene about it. He shrugs, setting his cup down to gesture dismissively.]
My father would rather someone else mind me most of the time.
[So! It's fine! Clearly, shipping him off to loiter in Fraldarius territory right after shipping him off to the north is convenient. Tell him more about the guest wing, instead... come to the guest wing and romance him... Know that he will be thinking about this extremely spicy concept for days.
He watches Felix stare out the window for a moment, wondering. Hmm.
Hmmmm! Okay, go for broke, why not—]
When will I have you all to myself, then?