dumbshow | highly new, slightly improved open post

highly new, slightly improved open post

assorted morons

optional prompts/ideas

☆ caught in the rain meme
☆ little steps meme
☆ affectionate physical contact meme
☆ picture prompt also acceptable but link them so it's tidy
☆ AU ideas: soulmates AU, reincarnation AU, Bad End AU, canon divergent/roleswap AU, dorky college AU, crossover AU, super indulgent high fantasy AU
☆ melodrama is ultimate tier
★ SHIPPING AND FUCC:
☆ non-fluffy relationship types I'm down for: codependent, master/servant power imbalance type ships, "we're bad for each other but worse for anyone else," other things I am failing to think of tbh
☆ things I am not into: noncon (includes "dubcon"), incest, tsundere shit if your tsundere is just verbally abusive, gratuitous torture porn, you'll probably have to ask me about harder kinks and they will vary by character
☆ I don't have a kink list so pitch me an idea if u thirsty
☆ if you would prefer a locked post I can also make that happen

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Are you having fun?

[It's a real question, though he doesn't release him just yet. But you can't be flat and sarcastic like that, not when he's still so tentative about things like autonomy.]

Yes.

[A beat. Well, under a thin veneer of constant panic and worry that someone will kick in Polnareff's front door at any moment and drag him back to the park. But that isn't Polnareff's fault.]

I'm... wondering about what happens next. But I enjoy your company.

That's kinda the thing, Kakyoin. Whatever you want is what happens next.

[He says it with half a smile, more rueful than the manic cheer he usually exudes.]

You understand?

Well— I suppose, in the abstract, yes. If we don't get caught.

[We, at least. There's that.]

But right now, yes, this is fun.

Good.

[He squeezes his hand as the next song plays, and oh, it's French, that's much more like it. It's bright and cheery, even if the lyrics are a little dark. It's a splendid song to nonsensically dance to, and they would, but oh, there's the doorbell--]

Ahh. Dancing and now dinner, huh?

[Probably a good idea. They neither of them are exactly out of breath, but at the same time, dancing burns calories (or oil, or whatever Kakyoin runs on, which, hey, does he need, like, an oil can, how does it work . . .)]

Go set the table, yeah? Stuff's in the kitchen.

[French, and some file buried in Kakyoin's head shifts everything into French for a moment; he nearly replies in French, but he blinks and shifts it all back instead.]

Uh— alright...

[He doesn't set tables, but he shuffles off into the kitchen and stands there for a moment scrutinizing the available stuff. Well, plates, he's got plates... is there a whole process here? He stands there holding a fork for a good ten seconds, fully aware that he knows how to use this thing but has never actually picked one up before this moment.

So the table setting is going great. He'll work it out enough.]

[Polnareff will be delighted the first time Kakyoin replies in French. Be told. But he's busy at the front door, presumably telling the deliveryman why he needs so much food, or at least a heavily fabricated reason why. It takes a while to gather it all up in his arms, but it smells good.

The table is not set when he gets back, but whatever, that's okay. He's got plates! It's great! And the Japanese food presumably comes with some chopsticks, albeit cheap wooden ones, so they're good.]

Man, you'd suck as a housewife.

[Cheerfully said as he dumps one, two, three bags on the table.]

[Two things: one, that's so much goddamn food, Polnareff is probably going to clog his arteries and die. Two: wow, thanks. Kakyoin tosses the fork down onto the table with a scoff. There, table is set.]

Thank you, that's a compliment.

[Don't mind as he peeks into all of these bags. What IS all of this.]

[A lot of everything, to be honest. Ramen and dumplings and duck and pasta, food that's a little fried and a little greasy but still good. Multi-cultural, that's what it is, and he sits, reaching past Kakyoin's face into the bag, starting to set it all out.

They will not finish all this food.]

There's chopsticks in there if you want. And water, uh. I don't know what you need to eat, exactly.

To be fair, I don't really know, either.

[They're doing great at this. He will go for the chopsticks, if only for that little smidge of familiarity. Will he eat, like, every type of food with these? Yes.

He surveys the whole... spread, a touch skeptically.]

But I'm also fairly certain I can't go into cardiac arrest, so you have my word that if you pass out from eating all of this, I will roll you somewhere comfortable.

Aw, just for me? You do like me.

[He coos it at him, overly saccharine, even as he reaches for some gyoza. There's a lot of gyoza. He likes gyoza. He does it blindly, keeping his eyes on Kakyoin, wanting to see if he can earn another blush soon.]

Hey, will you give me mouth to mouth, too?

I— hmm. [Can he give mouth to mouth, actually? Like, he has the compulsion to breathe, but if he doesn't need to... does he have lungs?? Hoo boy. He frowns.]

We'll see. Try not to choke, regardless— I like you better conscious.

[Oh my god it was a come-on, Kakyoin, come on.]

What do you mean, we'll see? What if I do choke!

[what if he has NO LUNGS, JEAN]

Are you planning on choking to prove a point? Don't be ridiculous. Eat your food.

I'm just saying, that's not really reassuring, Kakyoin, you could at least be a little nicer . . .

[But. He eats his dumplings, so. Who's really in charge. And he is eating, he is, but also: he's watching Kakyoin eat, more intent than he ought to be. It's interesting, okay! It's interesting to see someone try food for the first time.]

So?

[Kakyoin, who is definitely the boss here, rolls his eyes. Pleasantly. He's eating and that's what counts, playing along with Polnareff's... nice thing, or whatever this should be called.

That said, it's... definitely food. He's not sure how mindblowing this is supposed to be - being able to look around and not see props and a set is much more, still - but it's different. Good, if he's being generous.

So instead of answering, he reaches over with his chopsticks and plucks a dumpling away from Polnareff to eat. His now, thank you.]

[Hey-- hey, and he blinks, surprised, before scowling.]

You don't get-- give it back, you don't get a free pass just because you're newly freed, for crissake--

[Fork versus chopstick: which will win? Chopstick, probably, but then again maybe not, because Kakyoin has robot skills but Polnareff is, honestly, fairly decent with a blade. Or fork. Whatever. The point is: he's leaning over the table, jabbing enthusiastically, scowling as Kakyoin.]

Hey!

What? Did I do something?

[Kakyoin has pettiness on his side, but the fun kind of pettiness - the haha it's just a joke kind, which results in this dweeb-ass chopstick/fork fight and culminates in Kakyoin leaning back across the table to just feed Polnareff a totally new dumpling. Just pop that right in there when he next opens his mouth to whine.

For the record this still counts as a Kakyoin win.]

There, happy now?

[--oh.

Oh. Well, and he blinks, wrinkles his nose. That's good, sure, and he chews, swallows, because yeah, he had wanted a dumpling, so, fine, that's great. But he'd also kind of enjoyed fighting with Kakyoin, and so he frowns just a little as he eats.]

Not entirely. Not yet.

[And he looks a little pointedly: ask me what would make me happy.]

[Kakyoin raises an eyebrow at him. He twirls his chopsticks thoughtfully, putting up, like, at least a little bit of resistance to this obvious bait-- but ohhh, his rising to the bait stat is so high, so fine! Fine--]

What else do you want, then?

[Oh, fantastic. He grins in far more delight than he really ought to have, too pleased to capture Kakyoin's attention.]

Tell me something about yourself.

[It's softer than before, but no less intent.]

Something I don't know. Something you haven't told others.

Oh.

[He's surprised - that's it? How sentimental - but not too surprised. Something he hasn't told others... does that include the other hosts? Do the stories that happen when guests aren't watching count? Hrm.

What secrets does he even have? He's run away from home, but that one's come up before... He's great at shogi?? That's boring! Ah—]

Well, the timing is poor, but... my given name is Noriaki.

[Thanks for breaking him out of robot prison despite not knowing his first name, that's a true friend.]

Ah--

[That's new. Only belatedly does Polnareff realize he didn't know anything but Kakyoin, and he's too unfamiliar with Japanese to recognize it as a given or family name. But now--]

Noriaki. If you can call me Jean-Pierre, can I call you that?

[There's that delighted look on his face again.]

[Kakyoin shouldn't be surprised that that's the first thing Polnareff comes up with-- that's so his personality, of course, it was the obvious conclusion-- but he still blinks a few times in the face of that overwhelmingly bright look.

Whew. Okay. No one has ever genuinely called him by his given name, only his programmed mother--]

Sure. [And that sounds, ironically, too robotic, so he adds:] I-- think I would like that, actually.

[A lot?? Polnareff can't know all his tender feelings right at the start, but oh, it's a lot.]

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back at it again with the roboyfriend